


Abstruse

by RedxMistress



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Falling In Love, Healing, M/M, Multi, One-Sided Relationship, Threesome - M/M/M, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-10-16
Updated: 2018-12-26
Packaged: 2019-01-18 04:34:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 27
Words: 31,160
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12380997
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RedxMistress/pseuds/RedxMistress
Summary: He was everything he wished he ever was, everything he coveted the first time his dark blue eyes laid upon his senpai's elegant figure. He'd always been out of reach, way out of his league, way beyond him. Kageyama worked twice as hard as anyone in his volleyball career, obsessed with standing at the same ground as Oikawa-san; but the harder he tried, the further Oikawa gotten.Just when he thought he could never love another again, Miya Atsumu pushed his way through unbidden, making him rethink everything he knew about love.Here's the link to the Chinese translation of this story crafted by Siven_Vero:http://chifanyaaa.lofter.com/post/1fd60ef6_12cd3b5c4





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I've been playing around the idea of AtsumuxKageyamaxOikawa ship in my mind for quite some time now and finally, had the audacity to jot it down. I liked how Oikawa and Atsumu seemed so alike but so much different at the same time. And of course, I loved pairing Tobio with different Haikyuu characters because he's just that goddamn "shippable" :].
> 
> This is my first time writing a yaoi fiction and I hope everything goes well (curse you laziness). Hope you enjoy it~
> 
>  
> 
> Here's the link to the Chinese translation of this story crafted by Siven_Vero:  
> http://chifanyaaa.lofter.com/post/1fd60ef6_12cd3b5c4 

**KAGEYAMA**

Kageyama could feel the acrid taste of blood mixed with alcohol in his mouth. His tongue swept against his teeth, noting the deep ache the movement caused his bruised cheeks, before spitting at the pavement. He wanted to rub away the growing pain but his bloody knuckles gripping on the side walk rail was the only thing keeping him from falling down. He struggled to walk a few more steps, the dazzling lights and honking and bunkering of the busy streets of Tokyo made his head spin, causing his foot to stumble against the other. The pain blinded him for a second, his knees rattling against the ground as he failed to catch himself, the alcohol in his system slowing his genius-like agility and skills. Kageyama was aware of the dubious and cautious looks the passersby were giving him, he glared at them in return, not in the mood to take in their bullshit. Clumsily, he shifted into a sitting position, his raven hair covering the lids of his dark blue eyes as he slumped forward.

  
He was stupid, delusional and just downright a fool to leave his thesis behind unfinished; and rushed to hail a cab from Miyagi to Tokyo in the middle of the night, all because of a single text from Oikawa-san. His back pocket felt light, without a doubt a testament to his now empty wallet. His head was pounding, his eyes hurting, and his heart was on the verge of breaking.

  
He expected too much- too naïve in thinking that something will finally happen between them. Kageyama could still recall Oikawa-san’s smirking face as he opened the door to his apartment, noting the pounding of his heart as he took in the artfully messy hair framing the chiseled face of his senpai. Looking at Oikawa-san’s almost perfect figure never gets old, his memories of their time at Kitagawa Daiichi reminding him of the kiss he stole from his sleeping senpai. The buzzing inside the apartment should’ve been a warning of the impending doom awaiting him but the calloused palm of Oikawa-san against his and the smile that broke out his face unbidden threw any reservations out of the window. He was busy looking at their intertwined fingers that he was caught off guard when he bumped into someone. Kageyama briefly remembered mouthing a ‘Sorry’, his throat turned dry as he gazed at the familiar disinterested face of his ex-boyfriend Kunimi. Everything was a blur from there, his hand robotically taking shot after shot of the Pincer vodka. His recollections were a bit hazy but he remembered the feeling of gazing at Oikawa-san’s beaming face as he kept on flirting with Iwaizumi-san, his former kouhai already forgotten. He remembered getting so pissed and hurt that he unwittingly grabbed Kunimi’s nape and forcefully kissed him full in the mouth; the punch Kindaichi gave him was nothing short of anything he deserved. He remembered throwing a jab of his own, something in him finally snapped, and it took both Iwaizumi-san and Matsukawa-san to break the two of them apart. And lastly, he remembered Oikawa-san’s hard stare as he wordlessly kicked him out of his abode, leaving him with nothing but a busted lip and a crinkled duffel coat.

  
A soft laugh escaped him at first, then it grew into something harsh and hysterical, his heart shattering in the process. He furiously wiped his face against the fabric of his coat as the dam of tears finally broke, a heart wrenching sob escaping him. He was hyperaware of the few strangers who stopped and stared but he doesn’t care- he just had his heart broken not for the first time, but for the tenth time from the moment he met Oikawa-san.

  
It took him quite some time to rein in his emotions and when Kageyama was sure that he was not going to succumb to another break down, lifted up his head only to be greeted with a cold water pressed against his face.

  
“Drink up, Tobio-kun.”  
 


	2. Chapter 2

**KAGEYAMA**

Kageyama tried to push the cold bottled water away from his face but the effort was futile, his hands felt like lead and his spinning vision was making everything distorted. He settled for a grunt, his eyebrows naturally forming its usual frown, and earned a laugh from one of the people he least expected to see. More than anything, he wanted to be alone- to wallow in his grief and drown in his misery- but he knew the other person enough to be certain that his wish wouldn’t be granted, just like the only longing he’d fervently desired.

 

“Does your face has any expression aside from that, Tobio-kun?” The light fringe and familiar undercut of Miya Atsumu came into view. He was wearing his red Japan National team jacket, a gym bag hanging from one of his shoulders- without a doubt just coming out from a training session he’d overdid- and although Kageyama hates to admit it, he looks good- the tournaments’ sure whipped his body into shape.

 

“-none of your business.” Kageyama managed to croak; his voice came out scratchy and his throat was killing him. His emotions were still in disarray, he was still a mess, but he was starting to calm down though the stabbing in his head was not helping his condition in the slightest; he cursed silently.

 

“So cold~” Miya-san taunted, his lazy upturned smile stung Kageyama, reminding him of a certain senpai who shattered his heart into pieces, _over and over again_. Through the fuzziness of his eyesight, Kageyama squinted suspiciously as the older of the two effortlessly cast his gym bag aside and dumped his ass beside him, a mere two inches separating them. He watched as Miya-san’s deft fingers twisted the cap of the bottle and stared blankly as the now opened bottle was pushed towards him. “Drink, you look quite a mess Tobio.”

 

Wordlessly, Kageyama reached for the bottle and clumsily took a sip, choking and coughing as the cold water grazed his throat. Miya-san thumped him gently in the back awkwardly, a wry smile gracing his face as he watched him slowly regain his composure. Kageyama could feel the tips of his ears reddening from embarrassment and he swiftly downed the water in one long gulp to hide it. He mumbled a ‘ _Thanks_ ’ and played with the decanter repeatedly as they settled in a stiff silence. 

 

Tokyo was still lively despite the late hour, the neon lights mechanically blinking and the low thrumming of cars and chatters surprisingly lulling Kageyama into stillness. He still missed the scent of trees and cawing of ravens in Miyagi but he was too far from home, he was drunk and most importantly, he was broke. Kageyama pulled his knees up and rested his cheek on his forearm, his mind too tired to think, and his eyelids closing without warning as his headache continued raging on.

 

“Guess you heard it from him that we won our third game this season?”

 

Kageyama’s eyes fluttered open, his dark blue eyes settling on Miya-san’s, taking note of how long his hair had grown for the first time. “I did.” He replied quietly, vaguely recalling how excited, ecstatic and proud he’d been when Oikawa-san texted him the news of his heroism. “He told me how he’d outsmarted and outranked you this time, he seemed happy.”

 

He observed the slight tick of Miya-san’s eyebrow and the well-hidden irritation behind his dark brown droopy eyes despite his smiling face as he replied, “I was not feeling well and I don’t remember competing with him in the first place.” That one was a lie. Ever since Oikawa-san and Miya-san met at the Spring Tournament of their high school days, when the former decided to watch one of Karasuno’s match against the other powerhouse schools, they didn’t get along from the start and they always find ways to outdo the other- and it only intensified when they were both chosen to be part of Japan’s National Team. “Besides, if you were there, I’m sure your skills and prowess will far surpass his.”

 

Kageyama’s face scrunched up in anger upon Miya-san’s remarks; Oikawa-san is _not_ a genius, true, but he works harder than anyone else he knew and no one could deny his undeniable talent when it comes to volleyball. Miya-san’s knowing smile sobered him a little and Kageyama silently raised his right hand between them, “I’m injured remember?” Kageyama accidentally injured his wrist when he braced himself from tripping over the ledge, his rehabilitation doctor advised him to sit out the next two games and practice sessions to allow his sprained wrist to heal.  

 

He watched as Miya-san raised his own hand to capture it, his thumb drawing circles on his bloodied knuckles. “And now, you inflicted more damage to it.” Kageyama tried to remove his hand but failed, he was flustered for reasons that eluded him. “What did he do this time?”

 

That simple question crumbled Kageyama’s outward toughness, his chin trembling as he tried hard to contain his anguish. The events of the night inundated him once again, overwhelming him to a point that he found it hard to breathe. “I messed up,” He kept on repeating, and the more he said it, the more he believed that it was all his fault.

 

Miya-san yanked him back to reality, his eyes were hard but his touch was surprisingly gentle. “Come here,” he whispered, and Kageyama was the first one to close the sliver of distance between them, pressing his lips against the soft ones of his senpai.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: Adult content.
> 
> Not really satisfied with this chapter or something. I kinda had a hard time writing this. T.T I hope it's still okay-in-a-mediocre way though. Hope you enjoy~

**KAGEYAMA**

The kiss was sloppy and wet, his tears mingling between them. Kageyama could feel Miya-san’s surprise, the latter seemed to freeze upon his unexpected ministration. He used that moment of hesitation to his advantage, using his tongue to trace the outlines of Miya-san’s lips. His senpai tasted nothing like Oikawa-san, he tasted like mint and butter combined. Kageyama knew that he shouldn’t be doing this- kissing Miya-san in the middle of the night at some foreign place- but he was far too gone in his misery; he wanted to be comforted, he wanted to be _loved_. Expectedly, Miya-san regained his senses, and gently pushed him away- his lips drawn into a thin line as his brown eyes drank him in. Kageyama wasn’t supposed to feel hurt, he was not in love with Miya-san, but the rejection did it for him- he was tired of being discarded _repeatedly_. Anger and frustration welling up inside him, Kageyama bundled his fists at Miya-san’s jacket desperately and yanked him hard, his lips once again forcefully pressing against his senpai. Miya-san’s lips remained firmly shut and Kageyama could feel him resisting. He tried deepening the kiss, his shaking hand pulling at the ends of Miya-san’s hair, tipping his head up, but still, his senpai’s mouth remained close. Oikawa-san’s disappointed face flashed before Kageyama’s hazy mind, his heart burning at the memory, and that’s possibly the reason why he said what he said.

 

“Let’s have sex, Miya-san,” he drawled.

 

Kageyama watched the usual droopy eyes of his senpai turned wider, the sight was so rare that he couldn’t help but allow himself a small wry smile. Miya-san remained silent, probably cursing at him internally, but Kageyama could not bring himself to back down. He _needed_ this, he _wanted_ this- in order to erase the lingering scent and image of Oikawa-san inside him. Seconds ticked by and still nothing, Kageyama’s fuzzy mind was slowly clearing, starting to regret what he’d just said- but the pain was still there, never really gone; and just when he was about to call it a lame joke and just dealt with grief on his own, a simple word from Miya-san became his lifeline. “Okay.”

 

***********

 

He briefly recalled being half-dragged and half-carried by his senpai inside the cab, but Kageyama was too busy nuzzling at Miya-san’s neck, biting on the exposed flesh, to really pay attention to his surroundings. He remembered fumbling at his senpai’s clothes, trying to get the other naked, to which Miya-san laughed and told him, “Not in here Tobio-kun, you’ll make the driver blush.” He also remembered the slow and painful ascent towards Miya-san’s apartment, his mind filled with thoughts of his _carnal desire_ as he kept on stumbling and cursing. But he cannot remember Miya-san being this aggressive towards him.

 

The moment they tripped inside Miya-san’s apartment, the older of the two carelessly tossed his gym bag aside and pushed Kageyama against the wall, his senpai’s lips ravishing his own dry ones. The kiss was nothing of the sort Kageyama was used to- it was rough, needy and desperate, a kiss made for _submitting_. He’d always been the dominant in his past relationships, taking the lead in their sexual activities, that the sudden change in position scared him. Kageyama tried to fight Miya-san for control but failed, the latter was hell bent on making him bow, biting and pulling on his lips. He gasped for breath, his lungs aching and his mouth sore, and feebly pushed away Miya-san. His senpai doesn’t seem to like that, pinning his wrists above his head while the other hand was busy tracing the lines of his naked flesh under his shirt. Miya-san started grinding against him, making Kageyama opened his mouth in surprise, to which the former took advantage- inserting his tongue on Kageyama’s. A low growl escaped Miya-san upon hearing Kageyama’s moans, his movements became all the more rabid, his heat mingling with Kageyama’s. Miya-san’s desire was something new to Kageyama, he’d always been the one wanting, always been the one _needing_ someone. He felt tears trickled down his cheeks as the foreign feeling overwhelmed him, making Miya-san halt in his advances.

 

“Even if you told me to stop right now, I don’t think I could stop Tobio,” Miya-san rasped, breathless. He gently extricated himself from Kageyama nonetheless, creating a small enough distance to gaze on his dark blue eyes and wiped away the remnants of his tears. Kageyama felt compelled to look on the serious orbs of his senpai, feeling himself drown on it. He furiously shook his head in answer, his cheeks burning at the throaty laugh of his senpai. “So cute Tobio-kun~”.

 

That familiar sing-song taunt brought unwanted images of Oikawa-san in Kageyama’s mind and he found himself wretchedly kissing Miya-san as harshly as he did just a while ago, wanting to forget even for just a moment. His senpai seemed to understand what he was thinking and hauled him on his shoulders suddenly, kicking the bedroom door open and throwing themselves on the waiting mattress. Kageyama was not given any time to adjust as Miya-san resumed his previous assault this time, successfully undressing Kageyama in the process. The wet kisses Miya-san was trailing down on his naked torso was making him crazy, his groin painfully aching, desperately wanting to be touched and caressed. Miya-san went down lower, kissing the inner side of his thighs, making Kageyama raised his hips in answer and silent plea. He felt Miya-san smiled against his thigh as the older of the two grabbed his length, slowly pumping at first then faster. Kageyama sought his senpai’s eyes, seeing the undeniable lust swirling behind his smiling eyes, and hopelessly wondered what it would be like to have Oikawa-san in place of Miya-san. His thoughts were broken abruptly when Miya-san took him full in the mouth, a broken gasp leaving his lips, “Miya-san!” He buried his hands on the light fringe of Miya-san, using it as an anchor to reality as he was slowly but steadily succumbing to pleasure, his senpai’s mouth on his cock throwing any unnecessary and unwanted thoughts out of his mind. He stilled when he felt a finger pushed against his butt hole, the sensation was uncomfortable but not painful. His reservations and precautions were forcibly thrown out of the window as he felt the knotting sensation on his groin, his pants getting louder as his senpai studiously licked and sucked him dry. A shattering howl escaped his lips unbidden as Miya-san pushed two fingers in, stretching him wide, _in and out_. Kageyama’s hips rocked in answer as he continuously drowned in the pleasure his senpai was giving him, biting his lips hard when he felt himself losing control.

 

“Miya-san, I’m cumming!” He gasped, his fingers pulling on the older’s locks. Miya-san did not slow down, instead, he sucked and pumped him front to back vigorously, and within seconds Kageyama felt himself unraveling, spurting his seed inside his senpai’s mouth.

 

Spent and still trembling from orgasm, he watched with hooded eyes as Miya-san lazily disentangled himself from his sweating nakedness, licking his glistening lips clean and sucking the fingers he’d inserted inside Kageyama a while ago. The sight was so erotic that Kageyama felt himself going hard once again. Miya-san smirked at the sight and hastily pulled the rest of his clothes out of the way, the both of them now bare.

 

“Spread your legs, Tobio-kun,” he commanded and Kageyama’s body obeyed on instinct. “I’ll try hard to be gentle.”

 

Kageyama braced himself as he felt the tip of Miya-san’s cock on his hole, his heart pounding furiously. The first push was so painful that he scratched hard on Miya-san’s back, screaming internally at the sudden intrusion and feeling guilty at the times he fucked Kunimi so harshly in the past. Miya-san kept on pushing, his breath hot and heavy against Kageyama’s cheeks. When his full length was inside Kageyama, he stilled for a full minute before thrusting hard and fast, his control finally snapping. The sounds of their moans and lower bodies slapping against each other filled the room; he was losing his rationality. Kageyama locked his thighs on Miya-san’s and the position made the intense sensation he’d been feeling for the first time doubled. He was being submerged in pleasure _repeatedly,_ his consciousness being snatched away; and for the very first time in a long while, his thoughts were not filled with Oikawa-san, it was occupied by Miya Atsumu.


	4. Chapter 4

**KAGEYAMA**

Kageyama woke with a jolt, the lights from the opened curtains hitting his face. He blinked once then twice, his dark blue eyes adjusting to the brightness of the room. He smelled something nice drifting off from the partly opened door to his right, stirring his tummy. He flexed his fingers, flinching at the sudden sting it caused but continued moving it nonetheless. Breath rasped on his left side, tickling his bare neck a little, and he instinctively looked towards the source. Miya-san was sleeping soundly, his light undercut fringe covering his eyelids; he had the silly urge to push the hair away but luckily, he restrained himself. His eyes fixated on the purple bruise marring the other’s shoulder and the events of the night flooded him, his ears reddening at the tips. He might be drunk a night ago but Kageyama clearly remembered everything and _more_ that had happened between them on this bedroom. The remnants of the night was around him- the tangled sheets covering their naked bodies, the pillows piled haphazardly on the floor, the bite marks dotting his flesh and the bittersweet ache in his ass- and he had the uneasy feeling that the memory wouldn’t leave him for a long time. He felt himself hardening at the thought and abruptly sat up, the dizziness making him groan in irritation, but he was adamant on never acting on his desires recklessly _ever_ again- he resolved not to sleep with Miya-san for the second time. Surprisingly, the sobering thought dampened his mood and Kageyama felt his face resuming its usual scowl. He gingerly made his way out of the bed, ignoring how sore his hips and back felt, and picked up his clothes from the scattered ones on the ground. He donned his pants first, digging at the smartphone on the back pocket and light it up. _20 missed calls, 15 text messages_. He scrolled through his call log, Hinata’s name popping repeatedly along with his mom, and opened a new tab for message, “ _Meet me at the Tokyo train station dumbass. Don’t tell my mom, will tell you the details later. Thanks._ ”

 

Satisfied that Hinata will not blow his smartphone any time soon, Kageyama pulled his shirt down on his body and donned the rest of his clothes, smoothening the wrinkles on his shirt before straightening. He was unsure of what to do next, _Should he wake Miya-san? Should he just leave without a word? What the hell do you even say to someone you’d had a one night stand with?_ Irritated with himself and slightly abashed, he briskly walked straight to the door, cursing as he tripped lightly on the discarded boxers of Miya-san, and risked one glance as he opened the door wider. “Thanks,” he mumbled softly.

 

He padded quietly on the carpeted floor, his fingers tapping against his jeans uncoordinatedly as he tried to ignore his hangover. He was feeling just a tad bit guilty for leaving Miya-san without a word but he knew that it was for the best, _they should just forget everything that had happened between_ them- he still has Oikawa-san and his senpai still has his volleyball career to focus on. Thinking of Oikawa-san brought a wry smile to his face, his chest squeezing in the familiar dull ache it always had. He told himself hundreds of times that it was better to forget about his unrequited love but no matter how many times he beat himself over the fact that Oikawa-san will never look his way, _his heart still wants what it wants_.

 

He shook his head to remove the unpleasant thoughts as the sweet smell a while ago grew stronger. Kageyama had an instinct that they weren’t alone the night before and the clanking of kitchen wares proved his suspicion to be true. He closed his eyes in irritation as he thought of the awkward situation awaiting him on the other side of the room. He was hoping to leave the apartment unnoticed but that was futile.

 

Standing against the counter with his broad back facing him was Miya Osamu, his senpai’s twin brother. He barely remembered seeing him countless of times during their matches but he was always idling behind his sibling, shying away from attention. Kageyama could not even recall if they talked once and his situation right now looked bleaker _as time passed by_.

 

“He’s still sleeping huh?”

 

Kageyama blinked dubiously before stuttering a, “Y-yes senpai.”

 

 

The silence that followed was torturous and he found himself shifting foot to foot to somehow ease the growing tension in the room. Kageyama was tempted to run towards the front door but there was something in the older boy’s stillness that warranted obedience. _He had the same stature as Miya-san._

He watched as Osamu-san balanced the plates of bacon, ham, egg and toasted sandwiches as he set it on the table gracefully before finally facing him. He was amazed at how similarly Osamu-san and Miya-san looked and couldn’t help but blushed as the other guy looked at him unnervingly.

 

“Rough night?” Osamu-san asked, a playful smirk slowly painting his face. He could feel his senpai’s eyes on his neck and Kageyama hastily covered it with one hand. His senpai just laughed softly and pointed him to an empty chair. He was inclined to refuse, to save himself from further embarrassment, but the eerily familiar silent gaze directed his way made him gulped down his protests unwillingly.

 

He watched as Osamu-san served him with a plate teeming with food and he bowed gratefully as he accepted it. They ate in silence, the sounds of their chopsticks grating against the plate the only thing to be heard. He kept on sneaking glances at the boy across from him, trying to decipher what the other was thinking- but he was repeatedly _thrown off his game_ as the brown eyes caught his dark blue ones without fail.

 

“You were too loud yesterday, I had to wear my headphones and amped the volume to drown out the sounds.”

 

He choked on his sandwich, his breath wheezing from effort, and quickly downed the glass full of water Osamu-san had graciously given him. He thumped his chest repeatedly to clear the knot inside and scowled at the amused face of the guy across from him. He should’ve known that this would happen, _anticipated it even_ , but nothing beats the real thing. He could see how the other was enjoying his demise and he was reminded why Miya-san and Osamu-san were called _twins_ , the both of them knew how to get on his nerves. He tried to feign indifference, looking straight ahead and settling for a smile, but his grumpy and reddened face refused to cooperate; Osamu-san’s smirk seemed to widen at the action.

 

“I almost got hard as you kept on screaming Miya-san but thankfully, I remembered that it isn’t me you’re calling.”

 

Kageyama shifted in his seat, ready to bolt anytime soon but the sudden piercing gaze of Osamu-san rooted him on the spot.

 

“I don’t mind you having sex with my brother but make sure you tell him there’re no strings attached, he could be a real idiot at times.”

 

“I-I will.”

 

“Good.”

 

“Don’t tease him too much Osamu, he might not come back here again.” The throaty sound came from behind him, sending unwanted shivers down his spine. He looked at the other twin across from him, noting the devilish grin gracing his lips and mentally cursed. _He was trapped_. He readied himself to run but was stopped by the lean arms caging him in. “Going somewhere Tobio-kun?”

 

He scowled in answer at Miya-san, the bitten lips not escaping his notice, and groaned internally as he heard the front door clicked shut and Osamu-san shouting, “Take it slow, the walls here are paper thin.” He knew right then that _he was screwed, figuratively and literally_.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not so sure about this one, been feeling down for a while. T.T I hope you'll still like it though.

** KAGEYAMA **

Kageyama felt the warm brush of breath on his face as Miya-san laughed quietly at his twin brother’s parting remarks. He was hyperaware of the arms caging him in and the heat of naked flesh behind him, the older man’s virile scent making him fidget in his seat uncomfortably- his body betraying him. He watched as Miya-san purposefully bit his own lips seductively, his dark brown eyes _challenging_ , wanting him to submit. He could feel himself stirring, answering to the call, but unlike yesterday night- he has his wits today, _he will not yield to his desires uncontrollably ever again_.

 

“I’ll be going home now Miya-san.” He said defiantly.

 

He watched as Miya-san smiled wider, his amusement clearly shown on his face, and Kageyama’s previous irritation with his senpai’s twin brother skyrocketed. He abruptly stood up in his seat, hoping to catch the man off guard and bolt towards the front door but failed; his senpai seemed to read his mind and predicted what he’ll do, calculating two steps ahead of him. Miya Atsumu restrained him fully in his seat, resting his chin on Kageyama’s vertex and sticking his naked torso against his fully clothed ones.

 

“Why don’t you stay for another night?”

 

Kageyama was caught off guard, not really used to hearing someone, other than his friends, invited him over at their house and although he doesn’t mean to, he grew suspicious. It had been such a long time since he grew accustomed to people not wanting to get close to him, he knew they don’t like him, _intimated by him, even_ ; he heard it all the time. And the foreign feelings Miya-san was slowly but steadily imposing upon him _scared him_ , he’s not fond of the feeling.

 

“Why? So that you’ll get laid again?” He remarked sarcastically.

 

“Those scathing remarks will not wound me Tobio-kun, I know you don’t mean it. Besides, it makes you more adorable.”

 

He wasn’t sure how to respond to that, his earlier ire seemed to dispel in a poof, and he suddenly felt tired. He could feel his body aching, his busted lip and bruised cheek throbbing, and he sagged defeated against Miya-san’s body.

 

“Finish your food first while I make an ice pack for your cheeks.”

 

Wordlessly, Kageyama obeyed the older man, chewing on his food while watching him rummaged in the fridge, his bare back facing him. He almost choked on his food as he stared at the angry nail marks marring Miya-san’s once impeccable back, and an unbidden image of their naked bodies intertwined and Miya Atsumu pounding him vigorously flashed in his mind. He reached for the glass of water and quickly downed it to hide the flushing of his cheeks and calmed his growing desire as his senpai raised his eyebrows in question upon catching his stare.

 

He mumbled a _thanks_ as he accepted the ice pack and averted his eyes from the calculating dark brown ones across the table. He could feel the lingering questions in the air and he was not sure he was ready to answer it and share his grievances with someone he’d just recently been intimate with. It might sound like Kageyama’s making excuses because _he really is_ but having sex doesn’t mean sharing your woes and personal life with each other. They'd never reached that point of familiarity in the first place.

 

“What happened last night?”

 

He stilled for a moment before masking his discomfort with a scowl. “Nothing.”

 

He noticed the tick of Miya-san’s eyebrows in irritation and chose to ignore it. “Don’t you get tired of it? He’s just throwing you in circles, when will you realize that?”

 

“It’s none of your business.”

 

“It is my business, you are my business. I’m getting tired of watching you get hurt again and again by the same person.”

 

“Then don’t watch!” He exploded, hitting the table hard. His already split knuckles screamed in protest, the sharp and biting sting keeping his senses wide awake. He watched the angry glint on Miya-san's eyes fade into comprehension, his face returning to the same unreadable cover he always seen him don in practice.

 

He felt a warm strong hand gripped his injured ones and he flinched from the sudden contact. “I can’t bear to see you hurt. He’s taking you for granted, everyone from the team could see that, so why couldn’t you?”

 

He bit his lips to keep from lashing at the older man, his emotions thrown into disarray. He recognized Miya-san’s concern, could feel a small bud of gratefulness within him, but he refused to acknowledge what he was saying. It was his fault for falling in love with someone so perfect and unreachable, it was his fault for not giving up on Oikawa-san. If there is someone to blame in his unrequited love, it's  _him_.

 

“I can help you Tobio, rely on me more.”

 

He barely recognized what his senpai said and after a quick bow, rushed to the front door, ignoring the protests behind him. He almost tripped as took the stairs down three at a time, the adrenaline rush getting to him. By the time he reached the street, he was sweating and his breaths were hard but he was grateful for the distraction- _he simply refused to think_. He squinted at the glaring sun, a pained smile painting his face, and started walking towards the Tokyo Station.

 

“You’re wrong Miya-san, no one could save me.”

 


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the get well soon wishes~ You're all seriously amazing. I hope you enjoy this chapter~

** KAGEYAMA **

The dimming lights in his room did nothing to curb his growing drowsiness, his eyelids refusing to stay wide open. He’d been staring at his desktop for quite some time, the letters and numbers jumbling together in his mind. Kageyama was aware that the AC just stopped running, the moist heat of summer seeping through his thin cardigan, soaking it wet, but his body refused to move- he was stuck on the floor, stacks of books around him.

 

He was tempted to ditch his thesis and picked up his _Mikasa_ ball to practice tossing, but the promise his mom coerced from him hindered Kageyama from doing so. To say that his mother was furious when Hinata brought him home was an understatement; his mother’s dark blue eyes, so much like his own, pinned him on the spot, the churning anger behind it enough to make Kageyama felt something perilous to fear. Ever since then, he’d been under house arrest, forced to finish the papers he’d carelessly left behind so as to make the cut for the next semester.

 

Kageyama slumped on his study table, allowing his body to rest for a while and tapped his itching fingers rhythmically on his lap. It seemed ages since he last handled a ball and he was worried that it wouldn’t feel the same way, he prided in studiously practicing and honing his skills. A heavy sigh escaped him and a frown decorated his face but he succeeded in suppressing his urge, he owed it to his mother to get serious in his studies once in a while, and he was sure, _he was the one who scared the crap out of her_.

 

Bumping his forehead on the table twice, he glared at the screen and resumed his typing, the sound of keys drowning him once again.

 

It was past six in the evening when the door to his bedroom banged open, the sound startling him so much that he clicked the X button on the desktop.

 

“Kageyama!” A voice shouted. He scowled at the figure standing on the entrance to his room, the bright cheery smile and the ever brighter orange hair of Hinata Shouyo greeting him amicably. Hinata was holding a plastic bag containing his favorite curry bun in one hand and Kageyama bit back his outburst.

 

He watched as Hinata bounded across the room excitedly, his head bobbing up and down stupidly, and settling himself beside Kageyama- a questioning stare directed at him.

 

“I was sweating.” He deadpanned, crushing the smaller boy’s face in irritation as he saw the joking smirk growing on his face. Kageyama shouldn’t feel embarrassed, he was a man and he was entitled to take off his shirt and cardigan when he felt suffocated, but the teasing smile of Hinata was forcing him to feel just that. _Stupid Hinata_.

 

Hinata had the nerve to laugh and Kageyama squished his face harder in answer.

 

“Your AC’s working so why didn’t you just turn it on?” Hinata asked haughtily, rubbing his face when Kageyama finally let go.

 

“I was lazy,” he admitted in a small voice.

 

“Really?” Hinata taunted, his eyes scanning the taller man’s bare torso in a scandalous way, hoping to make the other person feel more uncomfortable. “If I know, you just wanted to show me the remnants of your conquest at Tokyo.” To further vex the usually grumpy Kageyama, Hinata purposefully ran down his index finger on the fading bite marks dappled on Kageyama’s back and took delight when the other man swung out, aggrieved.

 

“Shut up dumbass. It won’t happen again.”

 

“Why?”

 

“You realize that I’m grounded right, dumbass?” He growled, snatching the bag of bun from Hinata and wolfing it down into two bites.

 

Hinata shook his head in amusement, tempted to push it, but chose to let go _for now_. It was never a good idea to let Kageyama mull with his thoughts. In a way, he was thankful for Miya Atsumu- for giving Kageyama a place to sleep and rest in a place so far away from home and for taking his mind off the _Grand King_ even for just a moment. He’d lost count of the times he’d watched the raven-haired beauty burned silently in jealousy, watched him engulfed in grief and misery as he watched the man he’d put at a pedestal longed for someone else. Hinata should know, _he used to watch Kageyama the same way before_.

 

Shaking the sober thoughts out of his mind, Hinata clicked Kageyama’s monitor to life and his lips thinned as the triumphant grin of Oikawa Tooru greeted him on the screen. “I thought you were finishing your thesis?”

 

Kageyama hurriedly pushed the smaller man aside, his cheeks reddening, and hurriedly tried to close the tab, only for his clumsy fingers to click it open. The sound of cheers and jeers filled the room, the sonorous voice of the crowd at the background shouting _Japan! Japan!_ painted his cheeks a deeper shade of red. The camera focused on the candid way Oikawa Tooru of Japan National Team shouted in satisfaction, his eyes shining with pride and joy. He couldn’t remember how many times he’d re-watched the goddamn recent video of his team’s 4th victory, he’d always pause his media player on the exact same frame of his senpai’s grinning figure, his heart swelling with a combination of _satisfaction and acerbity_. He missed playing volleyball, but more than anything _he missed playing alongside him_.

 

“I am finishing it,” he snapped. “If you weren’t so loud in your coming, I might not have to adventitiously click my unfinished work close.”

 

“Uhuh. But it still doesn’t explain why this tab’s open.” Hinata said, his voice proud.

 

“I was curious so I- Fine, I was re-watching it for a couple of times, happy?” Kageyama growled, hating the stupid grin on Hinata’s face.

 

Hinata pushed him aside and gazed at the screen, his eyes fixated on the victorious team’s faces. Kageyama watched him silently, his mood dropping. He could feel the intensity with which Hinata was studying his team mates, the silent yearning he’s emitting; and it was especially intimidating this up close. He knew he ought to say something but he didn’t know where to start.

 

“I’m fine, Bakayama. I’ve been fine for a long time.”

 

Kageyama nodded solemnly, his dark blue eyes resting on the smaller man’s knees subconsciously. He still remembered how hard Hinata took it when the surgeon bore the news of him not ever returning to competitive sports, the shattered knee he incurred from saving the careless student to blame. It took the whole Karasuno team a year to get Hinata closer to the gym without breaking down and another year to get him to touch a ball. Suga-san and Daichi-san used to go back and forth from their university to Miyagi to check up on Hinata.

“I thought you’re here to help me with my thesis?” Kageyama asked, clearing his mind of somber thoughts.

 

Hinata cheekily made a face at him and resumed watching the clip. Kageyama was forced to hit him in the head, a playful smile gracing his lips. He was grateful for Hinata, for always being there whenever he needed someone the most and he was thankful that after everything, _he was still here_.

 

He wrestled the smaller man, pinning his small head against his body and laughing as Hinata flailed wildly. He ruffled his orange head in affection before letting go.

 

They spent the rest of his summer this way, finishing his thesis and geek _ing_ over volleyball. He thought everything was peaceful at last until he received a text from his coach- he was being summoned to their victory party. And Kageyama wasn’t sure whom he dreaded to see the most, ­ _Oikawa-san or Miya-san_.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry for the late than usual update. T.T I've been busy with my post-graduate school and work and was kind of mind boggled as of how to fit my writing schedule. This is a short chapter than usual but I hope you still liked it~ 
> 
> Thank you for reading <3

** ATSUMU **

Atsumu softly bumped his forehead against the tiled wall, the continuous trickling of the water drowning out his ragged pants. He closed his eyes in frustration, groaning loud as his hand frantically pumped his hard member; the aftertaste of Kageyama’s desperate kisses and salty pre-cum still lingered in him, his body coiling in desire. It’s been weeks since he last saw the raven-haired beauty but the pieces of him that he left behind were indelible.

 

Atsumu _is_ a neat freak, but he could not bring himself to clean his room- _erasing the evidence of Kageyama’s presence_. He left his room the same way it was when Kageyama walked out his door, to keep a small part of the younger man with him. His body _remembers_ how perfectly his kouhai felt against him every time his soft mattress caressed him to sleep; his eyes _remember_ how erotic Kageyama looked as he cried in pleasure helplessly beneath him, and his ears _remember_ the sound of his name on the younger man’s lips.

 

He bucked his hips in unison as his movements grew faster, gritting his teeth in agony as he felt himself unraveling- his semen being washed away by the steady stream of the shower. It took him quite some time to regain his bearings and resumed his bathing, his mind wandering on Kageyama, _always_.

 

The raven-haired beauty caught his attention the very moment he stepped foot confidently on their Youth Training Camp, drawing everyone’s stares on his elegant figure. He was irked at the impassive way he communicated with everyone and before he knew it, he was trapped in the younger man’s enigma. Atsumu could still remember the pained face Kageyama wore when he accidentally witnessed Oikawa’s outright rejection of the blue-eyed idiot for the first time, the hidden misery and unshed tears behind those dark blue eyes embedded in his memory; it was on that moment that his mere fascination of the genius setter turned into desire- _he wanted Kageyama to long for him the same way he did for Oikawa Tooru_. He was adamant about pursuing Kageyama then, stealing his number from Oikawa himself, but his twin brother Osamu advised against it, saying not to push the younger man on the _brink of madness_. He acceded and settled in watching from the shadows, his hatred of the former Aoba Johsai captain growing stronger every time he killed Kageyama’s heart _over and over again_. He was planning on waiting for the dark haired man to grow tired of loving someone as selfish as Oikawa, _someone_ _who couldn’t see someone else’s worth,_ but the mistake that same man did pave a way for him.

 

Kageyama made the first move and this time, Atsumu _meant to make his last_.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not really sure about this one, eh? I've been struggling writing for the past days. T.T Hoped you still like it though ;]

**KAGEYAMA**

The sound of his shoes squeaking on the gym floor was refreshing, a welcome breeze _he craved for weeks_. He’d been banned to practice tossing ever since the incident of his sprained wrist and escapade on Tokyo, but his rehabilitation doctor gave him clearance to do so yesterday, and his mom conceded albeit _grudgingly_. He’d done everything he could to make up for the fright he caused her and the understanding behind his mother’s dark blue eyes as she watched him geared up for his morning routine was all the assurance he needed.

 

Kageyama’s eyes fixated on the ball before him, calculating its trajectory and setting it gracefully- his sinewy build working perfectly. He’d missed the familiar ache of his body as he spiked and set tirelessly, and he was desperate to make up for the lost times, _he needs to be on the same footing again as Oikawa-san_.

 

He was lost in the rhythmic feel of the ball against his fingers, palms, and forearms and before he knew it, it was time to go.

 

Kageyama dreaded going back home because it meant readying for the victory party set up by their coach. He was tempted to fake his sickness, not really in the mood to see his teammates’ faces. Sure, he wanted to see Oikawa-san, to hear him laugh and to watch the teasing lilt behind his brown eyes, but he didn’t know how to act in front of him- _not after his previous misdemeanor_. And although he was trying to ignore it, he wasn’t ready to face Miya-san again, the older setter kept on popping unbidden in his dreams.

****

He took the long road back home, his legs protesting from the effort but Kageyama savored the pain, it kept him distracted. He initially invited Hinata to go with him but the smaller man refused, and the wry smile that graced his usually cheery face said all the unsaid things that was needed- _it was still agonizing to not do what you knew you were born to do_. Kageyama ran faster, pushing himself harder and hoped that the night would be better.

 

***

The bright lights and the loud noise was making his head hurt, his frown plastered on his face. Kageyama was trying his best to hold down his liquor, the need to yield to his impulses was trying to inundate him once again. He’d been at the party for three hours now but to him, _it seemed like forever_.

After the usual courtesies and congratulatory remarks they’d had two hours ago, he was left to his own devices- simply because he wanted to. Kageyama did not expect Oikawa-san to invite his former Aoba Johsai teammates to the party and the fact that he did, says something about their unfinished business. Kindaichi’s been glaring at him for quite some time now and the guilt was slowly eating him away. He tried approaching Kunimi, to apologize for what he did, but the rest of the Aoba Johsai team barricaded him. _He deserved that_. He resigned to stay in the shadows and nursed his pain.

 

He took a swig from his vodka for the eleventh time, grimacing at the burning fire it elicited down his throat, but feeling alive as the minutes passed. He watched his teammates goof around, a smile gracing his lips once in a while, and try as he might, his dark blue eyes kept on wandering back to Oikawa-san’s elegant figure. _It’s been weeks since he last saw him and the ache he felt just from watching never even subsided for a bit_.

 

Kageyama carefully studied his senpai’s reaction from afar, noting the arching of his eyebrows and the thinning of his lips as he talked with Iwaizumi-san. He did not register what was happening at first, too busy seething silently in jealousy and anger, but the change in Oikawa-san’s stature- _going on the defensive_ \- alarmed him on what was really happening, Iwaizumi-san and Oikawa-san were having an argument. Feeling emboldened by vodka, his long strides brought him over to where they were.

 

“We’ve been through this Tooru.” He overheard Iwaizumi-san stated.

 

“I know, just give it a chance.”

 

“I can’t, you know- Kageyama.” Iwaizumi-san greeted him curtly, cutting off what he was about to say to Oikawa-san.  

 

The sharp intake of breath from Oikawa-san made Kageyama focused solely on him. He watched the fleeting of emotions on his senpai’s wide brown eyes, the hint of desperation and grief within being replaced quickly by faked arrogance and irritation, and _he knew right then that something was wrong_. Iwaizumi-san had consciously hurt his senpai and Kageyama could never accept that.

 

“What’s wrong?” He asked. He watched Oikawa-san’s eyes widened in surprise before he regained his composure.

 

“My my~ Aren’t you being bold Tobio-chan?”

 

Kageyama ignored his teasing and repeated the question, not ready to let it go.

 

“Nothing, we were just talking and it’s none of your business.”

 

Kageyama brushed off the sting his senpai’s words caused him and continued his queries, the alcohol egging him on. “Iwaizumi-san clearly said something that hurt you and I wanna know why.”

 

“Drop it,” Oikawa-san warned.

 

“Why? I just want to kn-“

 

“I said stop it Tobio.”

 

They had a staring contest for a while, the tension between them rising. Kageyama could see some of his teammates moving forward, preparing to break them off should a fight ensue. He decided to curb his anger and gave in, dropping his gaze from the challenging ones of his senpai. It’s not the first time that they clashed like this and it definitely wouldn’t be their last but this one was different, _he cared more than enough for Oikawa-san but it’s slowly getting tiring_.

 

Kageyama realized that it was a mistake to come to this party and that it was finally time to go home; he curtsied clumsily and prepared to go- refusing to look into Oikawa-san’s direction- when a kiss at the neck froze him in place.

 

“Where are you going Tobio-kun? The party’s just getting started. We’re playing _never have I ever_ and you’re not allowed to go home just yet.”

 


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's the next chapter, hope you liked it ;]

** ATSUMU **

Atsumu felt the younger man stiffened at the contact of his lips on his bare neck, the tensing of his shoulder muscles very evident, but what made him smile darkly was Kageyama’s reaction to his statement- _the younger setter was clearly shaken_. He was tempted to push the man further out of his comfort zone, every cell in his body wanted him to assert his dominance. He’d been wanting to bug the dark-haired beauty ever since he stepped foot in the room but the unexpected summons from their coach hindered him from his plans. He’d been scolded harshly in private because of the way he’d treated his senpai Oikawa from their last match and he was definitely not going to apologize for what he did _but he pretended he will_ , to see Kageyama quickly. And to his surprise and irritation, he saw him conversing with the person he never wanted Kageyama to converse with, _Oikawa Tooru_.

 

He planned on manipulating Kageyama from the start, the darkness in him threatening to swallow him whole, but what pushed it to materialize was the scene before him- _Kageyama and Oikawa-san talking; Kageyama hurting, again_.

 

His statement caused an uproar he anticipated, the rest of the team and some of the outsiders buzzing with energy; they moved quickly in unison, pushing the makeshift tables out of the way and picking some of the clattered pieces on the floor. Atsumu couldn’t help but allow himself a small triumphant smile. His lips widened in mirth when Kageyama’s piercing gaze fell on him, the familiar scowl he associated with the dark-haired man in full view.

 

“Are you my father?” He heard Kageyama asked, a slight slur in his tone.

 

Atsumu noted the redness dotting Kageyama’s cheeks and neck, a sign that he was _close to being drunk_. He couldn’t help but hide a smirk, his plan was going smoothly than intended. “I’m not,” he answered nonchalantly, wanting to irk Kageyama, and casually trace his index finger on the younger setter’s jawline, “but I could be if you want to, _in bed.”_ He whispered softly.

 

He watched Kageyama spun around away from him so fast and a bubble of laughter escaped his lips. The frown on Kageyama’s face deepened and his face was beet red, Atsumu knew that the younger man would get angry if he pushed a little more- _a risk he was not willing to take, not when they aren’t in bed yet_. He wanted to tease him a little more, to have Kageyama’s full attention on him but he needed to restrain himself, the game was yet to start.

“I’ll leave if I want to Miya-san.” The stubborn edge in Kageyama’s tone made him smile.

 

“Will you?” He taunted, reveling in the fact that Kageyama forgot the presence of Oikawa Tooru watching them flirt. “Maybe, you’re just afraid to play the game?”

 

Atsumu watched the flitting of emotions passed on Kageyama’s eyes and winked at the disbelieving face of Oikawa-san when Kageyama consented, just as he knew he would. The brunette setter made a show of grabbing Kageyama but before he could, Atsumu pulled the younger setter towards him, _dazed as he was_. He rested his arm on Kageyama’s shoulder and smirked haughtily at Oikawa-san before dragging away the dark-haired beauty. He heard the familiar whine of his rival setter and the stomping of his foot as he trodden after them.

 

Atsumu could feel the stares following them as he led Kageyama on the floor, a circle of paper cups and bottles of beer neatly stacked on the rashly cleaned floor. He kissed Kageyama on the side of his head _once then twice_ and laughed merrily as the younger man swung out his fist, the redness reaching the tips of his ears. Kageyama glared at him furiously before sitting on the ground, ignoring him. Atsumu thinks he’s way too cute for his own good and he knew he needs to restrain himself before he pissed Kageyama all the more.

 

His eyes wandered around the room, noting the shocked faces of some and the approving eyes of the others. Atsumu settled his stare on the small group of former Aoba Johsai team members huddled together, their stoic faces unmissable. He especially took a long time studying the disinterested face of whom he presumed to be Kunimi Akira, his face probably molding into a scowl of his own. It was one thing to deal with Oikawa, but it was on a different level to deal with the _ex-boyfriend_. The team caught him staring, their curious and questioning stares in plain sight, and Atsumu smiled at them sinisterly- luring them into his trap. He could see the uncertainty on their faces slowly fade and they approached the growing circle in confidence, settling opposite Kageyama’s side, _taking the bait just as he knew they would_. He sat beside Kageyama leisurely, the smile never leaving his face and watched for a while as the circle grew and the people he wanted to be there ensconced themselves. When he was sure that the key players were all set, he called for the game to start.

 

“The rules are simple,” he started, eyes darting towards the dark blue eyes besides him; Atsumu watched Kageyama scrunched up his nose in concentration. “Each player will take their turns saying something they’ve never done before with the lines ‘Never Have I Ever’, those who did what the speaker was saying will be taking a shot from the cups before you. It’s up to you if you don’t want to be honest but if we caught you cheating, you need to run around the room, _naked_.” He smiled inwardly when he heard Kageyama took a sharp intake of breath. Atsumu could see him conflicted, wanting to back up, but he knew that the younger setter would never do that- _he was too aggressive and competitive for his own good_. “Shall we start?”

 

“I’ll start,” he heard Oikawa said. Atsumu could feel the tension risen up in the room, the other setter was picking a fight with him, _always_. “Never Have I Ever fell in love with my kouhai.”

 

His eyebrows perked in response to the fake smile Oikawa directed his way, he knew it would end up this way but he didn’t like how petty and eager the setter across from him was willing to beat him, that he advertently didn’t care whom he hurt. Atsumu picked the half-full cup in front of him, his eyes issuing a challenge to Oikawa; he felt Kageyama’s stare on his periphery and he subconsciously looked towards him. Staring at the dark blue hue of the younger man’s eyes, Atsumu raised the cup to his lips and slowly drank it, licking his lips clean afterward. He saw the angry red painted Kageyama’s cheeks and was a _teeny bit_ happy with the statement raised.

 

Not one to back down, Atsumu called to be the next player despite the protests from some of his teammates. Oikawa backed him up and that was the end of the argument. With his eyes glinting maliciously, Atsumu said, “Never Have I Ever fell in love with my best friend.”

 

He watched the brown eyes of Oikawa Tooru widened before forming into its familiar hard glare. Oikawa knew what he was doing and he faked a smile to cover up his slip-up; Oikawa gingerly lifted the cup to his lips in defiance, not once glancing at the stern face of his best friend Hajime-san beside him. He looked at Atsumu with contempt as he chugged down the beer. _Well, two can play this game_ , he thought.

 


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for supporting this fanfiction and for just being awesome people~

**KAGEYAMA**

There were two things that kept on repeating inside Kageyama’s mind; _one, Oikawa-san admitted to never fall in love with him_ and _two, Oikawa-san admitted to falling in love with Iwaizumi-san_. There was a slow burn building up inside his chest, a fire that was threatening to engulf him whole- _until he was nothing but ashes_. He’d always suspected that it was like this, watching from afar, but the unspeakable ardor Oikawa-san had for his best friend became something like a lifeline for him- _it wouldn’t be veritable if his senpai refused to say it out loud_ ; but the unintentional and indirect confession from the person he’d always wanted all his life was like a nail in his coffin- _he’s shattering all over again_.

 

He dug his nails into his palm as he watched Oikawa-san drank from his cup; he noted the slight shaking of his fingers and the forced smile he wore as he defiantly stared at Miya-san. He was aware of the mutual dislike going on between the two of them but he was surprised at the way things were escalating. His eyes darted on the imposing figure of Iwaizumi-san and he didn’t like the unreadable face he was wearing; _Kageyama wants to know how he feels about Oikawa-san_. He was tempted to take a drink himself, wanting to numb his feelings- _this unrequited love was getting tiring_ and _overdue_. Probably sensing what he wanted to do, Miya-san inconspicuously grazed his hand against Kageyama’s own, and the unexpected touch jolted him in place.

 

Kageyama threw a glare in answer, his face forming into a scowl, but he stopped short- Miya-san was smiling at him understandingly, _and that was worse than being teased on_. Remembering, the older man’s confession a while ago, Kageyama hurriedly averted his glance as he felt the blush creeping up his cheeks. He was flattered and entirely embarrassed but more than anything, he hates the stares directed his way, _it makes him uncomfortable_. Miya-san always seemed to find a way to throw his emotions into a loop, a minute he was devastated _and_ the next minute he was blushing like the dolt he is. He still doesn’t know what to make of the older setter’s indirect admittance of liking him; Miya-san probably just drank his cup to save Kageyama from the humiliation; after all, the people gathered here knew of his unrequited love to Oikawa-san.

 

His thoughts were cut short as the game continued, the next player said something along the lines of ‘Never Have I Ever kissed a man’. Instinctively and with relief pouring all over him, Kageyama took a hold of his cup and downed it in one go, the burning trail the liquor left behind was a welcome mess to his ever chaotic life. He was feeling quite happy for the temporary comfort the vodka gave him but it was stopped short when he subconsciously looked across from him, his smile freezing in place as _he watched in aghast when Iwaizumi-san drank from his cup_. Kageyama was sure that he wasn’t the only one surprised and confused by the turn of events- Iwaizumi-san _is_ straight _and Kageyama thought that ought to count for something_.

 

He reached for the bottle of vodka in silent anger as he noted the blushing mess beside Iwaizumi-san; Kageyama wanted to get drunk, he wanted to _forget,_ again. He was a fool for believing that nothing was happening between Oikawa-san and Iwaizumi-san, _he was stupid for taking Oikawa-san’s word when he said that they were just friends_ \- turns out, he was lying to him, and Kageyama hated himself for being a cretin.

 

Miya-san snatched the liquor away from Kageyama’s prying fingers and Kageyama lashed out, intuitively throwing his hand at his senpai’s face- to the horror of the others. By way of luck, Miya-san seemed to know that he would do that and his hand was deftly restrained by the older setter. Abashed and abased, Kageyama tried to ran but Miya-san prevented him from doing so. The older setter firmly but gently lifted his restrained hand and kissed the inside of his wrist- _a gazillion of butterflies fluttered inside his chest_.

 

“We’re good.” He heard Miya-san said to no one in particular, his dark brown eyes, _intense and unnerving_ , never leaving his face. “We were just playing a game, right Tobio-kun?”

 

Kageyama knew what Miya-san was doing, he was trying to appease the other players that he wasn’t lunatic. He could feel them looking at him, _watching him_ , and he didn’t like it one bit. His lips trembled slightly, a telltale sign that he was drunk and that he was _once again on the verge of losing control_ , but the eyes looking across from him was surprisingly comforting and Kageyama forced a gentle nod. Smiling with satisfaction, Miya-san kissed his wrist one more time before letting go and called for the game to continue.

 

The rest of the game continued with Kageyama refusing to lift his head towards the opposite direction from him- he _refused to look at Oikawa-san and the rest of the former Aoba Johsai players since he knew exactly what he’d see there,_ contempt and pity- two things he didn’t need right now. He barely remembered the rest of the statements, barely even remembered what he said, but he kept on taking shot after shot of the liquor. He was glad that Miya-san was not stopping him from drinking anymore, he was glad that _he was slowly going numb on the inside_.

 

The next player in line was Kunimi and Kageyama was prompted to upturn his gaze towards him. “Never Have I Ever been a tachi,” Kunimi whispered in a small voice; Kageyama managed to smile wryly before lifting his cup and averted his gaze when Kindaichi glared at him. He wanted to goad Kindaichi but restrained himself from doing so; he couldn’t help it if Kunimi was his ex-boyfriend- _everyone should just get over that fact_.

 

Not bothering to look at Kinidaichi when it’s his turn to talk, Kageyama vaguely heard him said, ‘Never Have I Ever been an uke’ before nonchalantly lifting his cup once again to his lips; the silence that followed was disconcerting and Kageyama was forced to look towards the reason, his hooded eyes scanning the crowd. He could see the shocked faces of each of them, their eyes fixated on his lips and the rim of the cup touching it. Kageyama didn’t get at first what they were so horrified about but when his eyes settled on the widened ones of Oikawa-san, he knew what was wrong, _he just indirectly admitted to sleeping with Miya-san_ , and the said man was smirking triumphantly beside him.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It felt ages since I last updated a chapter. T.T Had been busy with the holiday season and entertaining our relatives that everything flew by just like a blur. I hope this chapter made up for it though I'm not quite so sure about this one.
> 
> P/S  
> Merry Christmas and A Happy New Year! Though the greetings were long overdue. :]

** KAGEYAMA **

As the gazes of the people around him started to unsettle him, Kageyama realized that everything that just happened was all a part of a ploy- the sly fox beside him meant to unravel him anew. He ought to feel angry, to feel _humiliated_ , but the only thing he could manage to feel right now was _downright amusement_. No one has ever done something so unimaginable, calculative and manipulative to get his attention. Maybe it was the alcohol in his system reasoning out with him or the innate feeling of wanting to feel numb but as of this moment, he was _too tired and fed up to care_. He raised his eyebrows in the challenge and slowly looked at each person indifferently before stating, “What’s got you all in a twist? I like sex and Miya-san was good at it, so why not?”

 

He heard their collective gasps of bemusement and shock but he took a long time reading the wizened gaze of Oikawa-san across from him. The brunette setter was throwing a disbelieving and piteous stare his way and for the first time in his life, Kageyama felt _weary and hackneyed_ \- he was starting to think that it might be better to accept the fact that it was best to let go of his senpai. Something must have shown in his face because Oikawa-san reacted on impulse, the expression on his face fading and replaced with something akin to panic _and_ understanding, but Kageyama has averted his gaze long before the thought materialized into his foggy mind.

 

He could feel the hard stare Miya-san was throwing his way but he refused to look, _too embarrassing_. Some part of him was whispering that he would regret the confession that just spouted off his mouth, but at this point in time, he just wanted _to once again let loose_. Kageyama relished how much Miya-san desired him and he could feel himself slowly warming up to him- not just because of the alcohol he consumed but because of the littlest things he did to make him feel special. It felt good to feel _wanted_.

 

Kageyama called for the game to resume, and albeit hesitant, the other players consented and the game continued. The atmosphere was tensed than before, the spiteful exchange between Miya-san and Oikawa-san was growing worse every turn of shots. Kageyama could feel himself loosening up all the more, allowing the now touchy Miya-san to touch him every time he had the chance. He called for a break when he felt his bladder screaming, laughing when he almost stumbled on his own feet. He didn’t see the shocked faces of the crowd upon hearing his mirth and he refused Miya-san when he proposed to accompany him.

 

Relieving himself and almost falling asleep in the comfort room, Kageyama didn’t hear the soft click of the door as he was washing his hands. His dark blue eyes glaring in concentration on the sink, trying to get the blur out of his eyes. He sluggishly attempted to dry out his wet hands by flicking his wrist before ambling towards the door. He stopped in his tracks when he saw whom he assumed as Miya-san standing with arms crossed over his chest against the door.

 

“Miya-san?” He asked hesitantly, his blurry eyes making out the familiar stature and cropped haircut of his senpai but there was something different about him, and Kageyama’s drunk state couldn’t make out what it is.

 

“Mm-hm.” The figure answered.

 

Kageyama let out a relieved sigh and drunkenly walked towards Miya-san, his movements slowed and funny. He tripped twice and Miya-san held him steady for the third time. He could feel the older setter’s heat when their bodies touched and the suppressed desire he’d kept away unleashed. He fumbled on Miya-san’s shirt and pulled him close, smashing their lips together. He felt Miya-san stopped short for a while before smiling through the kiss and becoming aggressive. Miya-san pulled his zippers down and inserted his hand on his boxers, the heat of his palm touching Kageyama’s raging erection. The kiss intensified from there and Kageyama was caged against the wall behind the door as they subconsciously moved away from it. His moans grew louder as Miya-san pumped his length with abandon, his still wet hands locking on his senpai’s hair. Through his fuzzy mind, he noted the slightly shorter length of Miya-san’s hair but the thought flew out of his mind as Miya-san, ground his pelvis against him and pumped him ravenously. Kageyama let out a loud moan as his seed spurted on Miya-san’s hand, the euphoria slowly lulling him to sleep. He rested his forehead against his senpai, his ragged breaths calming down slowly.

 

“That was cute Kageyama-kun.” He heard the other said but he was knocked out to make out something from it. He dimly remembered the door banging open and his senpai’s shoulder shaking in mirth as someone shouted, “’Samu!,” and Kageyama didn’t know that he’d just handed himself over to the devil’s twin brother.


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for the gracious comments, you lot always made my day~

** ATSUMU **

The room was starting to spin, the colors jumbling inside his head. The peals of laughter and buzzing chatter inside was growing louder but indistinct at the same time. Atsumu let out a sigh, closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose to settle himself. He knew he was drunk than he’d intended but like always, _he’d gotten swept away by the turn of events_. He already missed the warmth of Kageyama’s body beside him and the thought made him shook his head in disbelief; he never really believed in love- never _intended to fall in love in the first place­_ but it just happened, and he was happy the way things are going right now.

 

He allowed himself to chug one last cup of booze before fully opening his half-lidded eyes and settling his gaze on the menacing and imposing statures of the former Seijoh team. A laugh burst out of his lips unbidden and once it had started, it was hard to contain. The chaos started from there and a tiny part of Atsumu was regretting it but the confrontation between them was long overdue. Oikawa-san yanked him hard by the collar, his angry face amusing to Atsumu’s drunken state and he laughed all the more. He saw Hajime-san approached, his glare was hard to miss and Atsumu let out a snort.

 

“What’s your problem?” He asked, not bothering to remove Oikawa’s hold of him. “Are you angry that I had sex with Tobio-kun?”

 

He watched as Oikawa-san jolted in surprise at the question, firmly shut his mouth and punched him square in the face. The sting shook him awake a little, his fuzzy mind clearing- _darkening_. Atsumu slowly licked the blood on his nicked lips before launching himself on the brunette. He’d always been searching for a reason to beat Oikawa-san to a pulp and this definitely counts for it. He jabbed him in the face, his lips curling into a sinister smile as his knuckles felt the crunch of bone underneath it. He vaguely saw his teammates scrambling on their drunken stupor to stop the fisticuff but no one succeeded as the heat of the moment engulfed the two of them. Oikawa-san kneed him in the stomach and Atsumu retched, holding it gingerly.

 

“Stay away from Tobio-chan,” Oikawa-san warned, livid.

 

“I won’t,” Atsumu challenged, spitting blood on the floor, before kicking the other setter in the gut. “Tobio-kun’s mine.”

 

“He’s not, we both know it. He’s too pure for you. And we know who he loves.” Oikawa-san smiled tauntingly. Atsumu’s vision darkened and he was ready to bash the older man’s head on the floor when Hajime-san and one of his teammates broke the two of them apart. _Lucky bastard_.

 

“He might love you now but who’s to say that he wouldn’t love me too and forget about you? After everything you’ve put him through shitty bastard.”

 

“Tobio-chan’s been in love for me in such a long time,” Oikawa-san stated, brushing off Hajime-san’s outstretched hand. “And I intend to keep it that way for many more years to come Atsumu-chan.”

 

Atsumu was glad for the restraint holding him because he wasn’t sure of what he would do, he doesn’t know this dark side of him threatening to engulf him whole. He watched furiously as the other former Seijoh team members trailed after the arguing figures of Oikawa and Hajime-san. He glared at their backs, hoping to burn a hole through them. Atsumu doesn’t understand why they’re showing concern now, they weren’t concern about Kageyama before and he wanted to hit them for their hypocrisy. He shrugged off the hands holding him back and brushed off some of the silent pity and concern following him.

 

He bowed in apology for ruining their victory night and staggered to where he knew Tobio would be. Atsumu needed to see him right now, to touch him and to kiss him- _he needed him to calm down_. His footsteps grew faster as he neared the bathroom, his body eager to feel the younger setter’s skin beneath his fingertips. He froze when he heard the familiar moan of Tobio-kun screaming _Miya-san!_ And threw open the door when his insides told him that something was _definitely not right_. Atsumu’s gaze zeroed in on his twin brother’s hand inside Tobio-kun’s boxers. He remembered shouting _‘Samu!_ Before pushing his twin out of the way and holding Tobio close to him, the younger setter was already snoring softly.

 

Atsumu threw a murderous glare in Osamu’s way and watched his twin held up his hands in surrender, the sly smile still painted on his lips. “He attacked me,” Osamu stated matter-of-factly.

 

“He’s drunk.”

 

“I know, that’s why I kissed him back.”

 

“We’ve talked about this ‘Samu, he’s mine.”

 

“I was impatient and you weren’t here to comfort him so I took the opportunity.” Osamu made the show of licking his hand free of what Atsumu knew was Tobio-kun’s sperm. “And he wasn’t yours until he says so.”

 

“Get out.”

 

He watched Osamu threw one last glance at Tobio-kun’s sleeping face before getting out of the comfort room but not before he stated his parting remark, “See you both at home.” Atsumu groaned in irritation and cursed loudly as he was reminded of how much his twin brother irked him, _they were two peas in the same pod_.

 

Atsumu gently settled Tobio-kun on the floor and kissed him on the forehead, his inner turmoil slowly pacifying. He sighed against the younger setter’s hair and pulled him closer than ever, taking relief on his familiar blueberry scent. They stayed like that for a few more minutes before he felt Tobio-kun stirred a little.

 

“Miya-san?” He mumbled sleepily, eyes half-closed when Atsumu looked at him.

 

Atsumu took in Kageyama’s disheveled hair, reddening lips, opened zippers and moist boxers, and he snapped- the image of Osamu and Tobio together was too much to bear. “Let’s get you cleaned up,” he announced before pulling his kouhai’s boxers down, taking him fully in the mouth.

 

“W-what?” He heard Tobio-kun muttered incomprehensibly but he was too far gone in his jealousy to care. He sucked him dry, Tobio’s moans and the squelching sounds of his lips against his kouhai’s raging erection the only sounds resonating in the room. He swallowed Tobio’s sperm and licked him clean as he felt him sagged drowsily against the tiled wall.

 

“You’re mine,” he whispered and Atsumu would do anything to _make it happen_.

 


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was sort of a filler chapter or something. I was not that confident with this but still hoping that you'll like it; let me know your thoughts. 
> 
> Thank you all for the wonderful comments; y'all the reason why I'm still fighting my way through the busy work and post-grad schedule of mine not to mention the bouts of laziness engulfing me day by day.

** KAGEYAMA **

The sound of arguing voices and the familiar scent of mint told Kageyama where he is long before he opened his eyes. He tightly closed his eyes as the wrath of hangover was starting to consume him; he felt like vomiting, everything inside his head spinning, and he did just that- _retched his insides out_. He barely recognized the hush that followed the first bout of his episode and the scrambling footsteps that proceeded afterward as he continued his business, the acidity stinging his chest. A warm hand touched his clammy forehead, pushing the bangs out of his dark blue eyes while another hand gently soothed his back, rubbing circles to somehow pacify his inner turmoil. He wheezed and huffed as the vomiting continued, tears stinging his half-closed eyes from the effort. He knew he was making a mess of the sheets right now, his puke everywhere- its smell adding to the uneasiness he feels as of the moment- but he couldn’t stop, _he feels literally like shit_. He tried to discard the hands touching him, moaning in irritation and protest as the petting continued, but whichever of the troublesome twins it is doesn’t seem to care about his pitiful and embarrassing state- _Kageyama doesn’t have the energy to fend off whoever it is_. The spewing and upchucking continued for a while, his chest protesting from the pain, and when it finally settled, Kageyama just dropped back from where he was lying a while ago.

 

“Tobio-kun!” He heard a voice cried in surprise and felt strong arms pulled him up. He wanted to open his eyes but his grogginess wouldn’t let him and so he slowly succumbed to his exhaustion, barely recognizing the shuffling of sheets and the sway of his body as he was carried to somewhere.

 

His consciousness slipped in and out of him, the stench of his earlier blunder still odorous to his nose; he tried to fumble at his clothes, but warm hands stopped him. A biting remark was on the tip of his tongue but he’d forgotten all about it even before he started to speak as the alcohol in his system continued to poison him, changing him inside. He tried to shy away as he heard the sound of raging water clicked open, his eyes squinting in effort to stay open but everything he sees was blurry and distorted. A strangled cry escaped his lips as the cold water touched his cloth-covered skin, caressing the shape of his legs and sticking so close. Someone hushed him and placed a gentle kiss at the side of his head, the simple gesture was enough to warm Kageyama inside. His body slowly grew accustomed to the temperature of the water and he once again found himself succumbing to drowsiness.

 

“He’s sleeping?” Kageyama heard a voice queried, his consciousness barely following the conversation.

 

A light chuckle slowly shook Kageyama’s body, the movement surprisingly comforting. “He is; it’s scary how defenseless and unguarded he could be. He’s too open for assault from the likes of you.” A slight hint of anger emphasized on the rough sound of the speaker’s voice.

 

“It is not assault if Kageyama-kun’s the one who came onto me. He called for Miya-san and last time I checked, my surname’s Miya so that ought not to count for perversion.”

 

“Shut up ‘Samu, we both knew what you did, excuses wouldn’t make up for it.”

 

“If Kageyama-kun wanted to kiss me, he could. I’m open for opportunities. He’s single, I’m single, and we’re both adults.”

 

A low rumbling that eerily resembled a growl escaped Miya-san, the sound startling the drowsy Kageyama. He tried to sit up, the water now reaching the tip of his collar bone. He was slowly regaining his senses, the lightheadedness was slowly fading to a tolerable threshold. His eyes slowly adjusted to the light, the glare wasn’t so painful as before. The sight that greeted him made his insides recoiled in an uncomfortable way, Osamu-san was standing defensively across from him, his dark brooding eyes told Kageyama what he didn’t want to know- _the twins are fighting over him_.

 

“Just rest,” Miya-san stated, his gentle calloused palm trying to push Kageyama back to where he was lying carefree a while ago. “I’ll get you cleaned up. Get out Osamu.”

 

Something inside Kageyama flinched at the dismissive tone Miya-san used on his twin brother. They weren’t exactly the complacent and non-arguing set of siblings but as far as Kageyama could remember they were never at odds with themselves as they did today. He was now reminiscing and being reminded of what he did wrong- _he make out with the wrong twin_ , and although it was embarrassing, he wasn’t exactly revolted with the idea, if anything the thought of having _both of them was exhilarating and arousing at the same time_.

 

Kageyama ignored Miya-san’s pushing, intent on making the twins stop their silly argument and scuffle, and started to clumsily pull out the vomit and wet-soaked clothes from his body. His nose scrunched up in disgust as his fingers grazed on the remnants of his earlier meal.

 

“What are you doing?!” He heard Miya-san asked, his breath tickling Kageyama’s nape.

“Undressing. I thought I need to get cleaned up?” He retorted. He saw how confused Miya-san is but he chose to ignore it, focusing instead on the other twin who was still rooted on the same spot. Kageyama could feel his stare burning through the fingers he was using to unbutton his shirt and he admitted to being quickly _aroused_ by the thought; with the alcohol embattling him and his suppressed sexual urges to blame, Kageyama beckoned Osamu-san forward, not minding the protest behind him.

 

Kageyama watched Osamu-san approached and he drowsily told him to get his tub filled with scented bubbles and to bring the scrub over. Osamu-san silently obliged and did as he was told. Kageyama was having a hard time unbuttoning the remaining stupid buds on his shirt and with a slight chuckle from Miya-san behind him, he felt him moved from the rear and started removing the remaining buttons of his clothes. His face was growing warm every second, his desire slowly but steadily building up, he felt Miya-san grazed the skin behind his exposed nipple, and Kageyama moaned in answer. He raised his hips clumsily as he felt Osamu-san tugged at the waist of his jeans; he allowed him to remove both his boxers and pants out of the way, Osamu-san’s cold hands advertently touching the skin of his leg. Kageyama could feel both their warmth enveloping him, their presence was enough to suck away at his attention. Osamu-san reached for the scrub and started cleaning him, the gentle but rough stroke of it calming to Kageyama’s distorted consciousness. His eyes closed without warning as the sensation ate away at him, his earlier sleepiness threatening to pull him again into its dark abyss. He cried out as he felt Miya-san’s fingers traced the outline of his bare torso then shifted to palming his chest with his supposed to be soap-full hands, the gentle swirls causing Kageyama’s building erection to stand erect. His drunken mind allowed the touch of Miya-san’s moist lips to pepper his neck with nips and kisses, the feeling it caused was _addicting and downright dangerous._ His eyes snapped open as Osamu-san scrubbed dangerously close to his penis; his eyes met the brown ones of his senpai, the mischief and desire inside were _palpable_. With a slight hint of a smirk pasted on Osamu-san’s face, Kageyama gasped as the older man palmed his erection and started pumping it with abandon while the other twin flicked his nipples and bite the skin between his nape and collarbone. He bit his lips hard as the sensation was too much to bear, the pleasure and pain _reinventing him wholly_. He subconsciously kicked on the tub as the twins did what they please with his body, his gasps, and moans drowning the three of them. His eyes rolled backward from too much pleasure as he came unbidden _and_ hard, his consciousness ebbing away. Kageyama barely felt the softest touch of lips on his as he steadily succumbs to unconsciousness- the twins filling him even in _sleep_.


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'd been busy dealing with life these past days and I felt that this chapter was long overdue. I'd been having a hard time choosing whom of the twins should Tobio end up in and I still couldn't decide as of the moment whilst the threesome- to see where it would lead me. Thank you for being patient and for being generous with me. I hope the story's not boring you or dragging you on. As usual, let me know your thoughts? :]

** KAGEYAMA **

Kageyama knew he ought to give himself a good beating and to stop his abandoned impulses whenever the alcohol seeps through his system; surprisingly enough, the vivid recollections of his almost threesome sexual interaction with the Miya brothers last night doesn’t make him feel like that- _he was not disgusted but he was rather aroused_. He risked a second glance on one of the twins across from him, the familiar foxy and calculating smile on full display. A scowl found its way on his face, not liking the smugness Miya-san was emitting. His dark blue eyes rolled in irritation as he settled on the languid figure of Osamu-san against the wall on his right, without a doubt constraining him from leaving.

 

“Am I under house arrest?” He couldn’t help but asked, the hard edge of his tone unmissable.

 

He watched how wide Miya-san’s smile grew and the glint that reflected off of his dark brown orbs could only mean one thing- _he was in for more trouble_. “We could do that if you’d like, the idea was tempting.” Miya-san reached across the table, the abruptness of the movement surprised Kageyama and he instinctively moved away in reaction, thinking that he was going to be touched. His embarrassment must’ve shown on his face as Miya-san only extended his arm to get some food; Kageyama was sure that he was such a sight what with Osamu-san chuckling a few meters away from him and Miya-san raising his eyebrow in amusement and he gritted his teeth as he felt a warm blush crept up from his neck.

 

“I need to be home by 5,” he deadpanned, ignoring the taunting smile of his senpai.

 

“I could take you home.” Osamu-san offered and Kageyama’s head whipped towards his direction. He watched the same smirk plastered on the other twin’s face, but the more he looked at it, the more he recognized the subtle differences in expressions between the two- whereas Miya-san’s _always a combination of ruggedness and manipulation,_ Osamu-san’s _always a mix between playfulness and treachery_.

 

“Don’t you have classes tomorrow?”

 

Kageyama watched the smirk grew on Osamu-san’s face, without a doubt liking his response. He was sure the twins were constantly thinking and worrying about him leaving, _they were probably reminiscing how fast he’d left the last time he was here, though in a different circumstance._ He was tired of denying himself the pleasures he desire; he was tired of his never-ending delusions.

“I do, but I could work on that. You, on the other hand, I couldn’t pass on.”

 

He couldn’t stop the redness painting his whole face with that simple statement, the casualness with which it was said astounded Kageyama a little. He was used to _always_ being the second choice, and the change in his status exalted him more than he cared to admit to himself. He knew he was being dragged into the twin’s pace and although it was _alien and scary_ to him, he was willing to compromise.

 

To hide his embarrassment, Kageyama shrugged a little bit too awkwardly to feign indifference and gobbled down his food. The laughter that filled the room told him that he was unsuccessful in deceiving them and Kageyama chose to remain silent in indignation. Probably sure that he wasn’t going to run anytime soon, he watched Osamu-san disentangled himself from the wall and sat beside his brother, his mouth already filling with food. Kageyama fidgeted and groaned in his seat as their breakfast went on, the silent eating away at him. He could feel two pairs of dark brown orbs boring into him, its intensity was slightly _suffocating_ and he couldn’t help but feel that he’d just fell into one of the traps the foxy siblings laid out just for him.

 

He didn’t like silence and being left with his thoughts because it always meant _thinking of Oikawa-san_ but the presence of the Miya brothers was reassuring- _they’re not allowing him to be in his own thoughts_. Truth be told, Kageyama was surprised at his calmness; if it was the past him, he’d definitely wouldn’t be cool in being a bottom and engaging in a threesome sex but it was different today- _he was feeling experimental, he was feeling liberated_.

 

Kageyama was glad that the twins seemed to have met an agreement of their own, it wouldn’t sit well with him if they were still fighting. Miya-san had always been there for him, he’d been a constant in his life, his _sole protector_ ; Osamu-san, on the other hand, was a welcome distraction, he’d cared for him when he didn’t deserve it, and it would be such a blow to break the two of them apart. He wasn’t ready yet to process what he’s been feeling for them, all Kageyama knew was that he was okay in engaging with sex with the both of them.

 

Not one to sugarcoat his thoughts, Kageyama asked the query he’s been dying to ask, “Are we having sex or not?”


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: ADULT CONTENT

** ATSUMU **

The dark tint coloring Tobio’s cheeks was enough to stir his desire. Atsumu closely watched the conflict of emotions played on the younger setter’s dark blue orbs and a wry smile graced his lips when he saw _determination and lust_ potent in it. He was sure that Kageyama was discarding his earlier confession, his kouhai was dead-set on focusing with his sexual desire but Atsumu doesn’t mind, _he’ll wait until Tobio accepts his feelings, he’ll wait until he allowed himself to heal_. It doesn’t matter if Kageyama sees him as a sex friend only, he’ll bide his time until he caged him within his arms. He was trying hard to suppress the beast inside of him- the beast that was _territorial and murderous_ , the beast that wanted Tobio _all to himself_. He was caught up in the moment last night and a small part of him admits that the idea of Tobio in between his twin Osamu and him was kind of hot but it doesn’t mean he was cool with sharing. He knew Osamu cared for Tobio in a way but not in the same way he did, not in the same way his twin was leading Tobio-kun to think.

 

In a way, the idea of Tobio also wanting Osamu stung but he knew it was just his libido speaking and Atsumu wouldn’t let it sidetracked him. He’ll just clench his teeth and indulge in his desires _for now_ \- he’ll do anything to get Kageyama Tobio and that was scary _in all sense of the word, the things he does for love_.

 

His eyebrow tic in suppressed surprise at Kageyama’s bluntness, the question making him hot and blazing inside. The mere fact that Tobio-kun wasn’t running away from his apartment so fast was a welcome bewilderment, but what astonished him the most was his indirect confession of wanting to have sex with them. Honestly, Atsumu was worried and wary of Tobio’s reaction when he woke up- _would he pretend that yesterday night didn’t happen and that he didn’t desire him and his twin? Or would he finally be true to himself?_ He was fervently wishing for the latter to happen, _though he wanted it to just be_ him, and for it to actually happen bring an evil smile to his face.

 

He felt his twin Osamu stiffened at the question, the bread he’d just bitten hanging off from his mouth. Atsumu wanted to smack his twin with the silly expression he’s making but he’d fought the urge; Osamu should’ve prepared himself for Tobio’s remarks, he is _unpredictable and challenging_ , and with a coquettish grin realized that _his twin brother doesn’t know Tobio-kun the way he did_.

 

Before any of them could react, Atsumu got up from his seat, the chair scraping against the tiled floor, jolting his twin to his senses. He held Tobio’s burning gaze on his own, licking his lips as he watched the red tint slowly painted his cheeks. Slowly, like a fox circling its prey, Atsumu made his way to where Tobio is and gently tipped his head up, his eyes scanning his face- looking for signs of _hesitation_. Satisfied and somewhat bittersweet upon seeing nothing but _desire and determination_ painted on his kouhai’s eyes, Atsumu took his lips for his own, swallowing Tobio’s moans and gasps.

 

Atsumu felt himself slowly hardening, the feel and taste of Kageyama stirring his whole body awake. He couldn’t remember the countless times he’d fantasized about kissing him, and he definitely couldn’t recall the many times he’d masturbated in his room, in the bathroom and in the locker room of their gym when he reminisced about Tobio underneath him, _of how it feels to be inside him_. Their first time was such _a dangerous mess_ , with Tobio drunk, broken _and_ desperate; and this second time aroused him _more than their first time did_ \- Tobio’s not drunk, Tobio’s _half-_ broken, and Tobio’s _desperate for him_. Tobio’s mouth opened against his own, their tongue dancing with each other.

 

As their kisses grew hot and heavy, so did Atsumu’s desire- _it was threatening to explode_. He fisted his hands on the black locks of Tobio, pining his face in place; he nipped and bit hungrily on the younger setter’s lips, savoring the taste of him- _seeming not to get enough of him_. His eyes shot open when Tobio moaned rather loudly, and his dark brown eyes settled on the mischievous ones of Osamu currently sucking Kageyama’s hardened length. Atsumu’s eyes grew dark in anger at first but as he continued watching Tobio’s dick going in and out of his twin brother’s lips, _uncontrollable desire gripped him_. The helpless gasps and mewls leaving Tobio’s lips, not to mention the sexy way his slender fingers holding on Osamu’s darker fringe, was not helping Atsumu’s case- _he was rock hard by now_. His nails dug painfully at his sides as he watched the erotic scene playing in front of him, _he wanted to make a mess of the both them_. Not being able to take it anymore, Atsumu grabbed Tobio’s nape, making the younger one face him _and what a sight he was-_ lips moist and parted, droopy eyes filled with desire, cheeks tinted in a rosy color. Atsumu stole an earth-shattering kiss, his tongue exploring Tobio’s before commanding, “Suck me Tobio-kun.”

 


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: Full-blown adult content below.
> 
> Sorry for the late update. T.T I've been busy with life for the past days and just managed to slip a writing or two in between just now. Hope you liked it~ Enjoy! <3

** KAGEYAMA **

The command stirred the remnant part of his _tachi nature_ , urging him to lash out and assert his dominance, but as his upturned eyes zeroed-in on the man in front of him- taking in the burning desire swirling behind the familiar dark brown eyes- his senses all but left him, _Kageyama drowned in his own desire_. He shakily pulled down Atsumu-san’s jogging pants, freeing his raging erection. Kageyama bit his lip nervously and slowly put the tip of Atsumu-san’s cock against his lips, tasting him tentatively. The salty taste of pre-cum and the virile scent wafting from Miya-san gripped Kageyama wholly, surprising even him. He found himself swallowing the older man’s dick as far as he could take, stimulating his gag reflex. He heard Miya-san grunted out in surprise and pleasure which emboldened him further; through the blurriness of his eyes, Kageyama continued sucking Miya-san’s dick, making his own rhythm. He could feel the burning gaze his senpai was giving him but for reasons unbeknownst to him, Kageyama refused to meet his eyes- averting his eyes anywhere else _but him_. His head was pushed firmly but gently against Miya-san’s groin, making Kageyama all the hotter inside. He rolled his tongue along the length of Miya-san’s shaft, delighting in the agonized cry that left his senpai’s lips. As he continued sucking Miya-san’s dick _in and out_ , the more erratic his rhythm becomes. Miya-san’s hands were fisted on his dark black hair by now, rolling his hips against his mouth, _making his own tempo_. They started slow but as Miya-san’s cries of pleasure were getting louder, so does his hips rocked faster- the length of his dick slipping in and out Kageyama’s lips with _reckless abandon_. Kageyama’s desire _skyrocketed_ from there and he found himself eagerly giving his senpai a blowjob. He felt himself getting all wetter from below but he resolved in making Miya-san cum before him. Kageyama could feel his senpai so close to unraveling, the rocking of his hips bordering _face-fucking_ but Osamu-san chose that time to up his game, probably in _collusion with his evil twin brother_.

 

Kageyama almost bit Miya-san’s cock as Osamu-san suddenly took in his whole length whilst playing with his balls, the sensation was too much to bear. His grip on Osamu-san tightened anew, his back arching and his hips shaking helplessly. He tried to push on the other twin’s mouth on his penis but the said twin seemed to take it as a sign to continue what he was doing. Osamu-san restrained his pelvis with his firm grip and rabidly sucked on his cock, not caring whether Kageyama writhes weakly from pleasure before his ministration.

 

Trying to get some semblance of control, Kageyama resumed sucking Miya-san’s dick, his mouth gasping and moaning in between each bout. The dark chuckle that left his senpai’s mouth sent a shiver down his spine and he found himself losing focus as his concentration was being veered away to the other twin below him. He found himself surrendering all control to Miya-san as the former gripped the back of his head and thrust his shaft inside his mouth, _again and again- growing_ harder and faster each second. Kageyama’s senses completely left him as he succumbed himself to the twins- the older setter face fucking him while the other twin sucking him vigorously. He didn’t last long as his seed spurted inside Osamu-san’s mouth, his thighs caging him in place as he rode the throes of his orgasm. Kageyama all but swallowed frantically as Miya-san’s semen poured into his mouth, the saltiness making him want to retch a little but managed to reign it in.

 

He plopped spent on his seat, the backrest poking on his nape as he tried to regain his composure, his eyes closed in bliss. He counted to three before opening his eyes as his breathing slowly levelled, the still rock hard erection of Miya-san greeting him. Kageyama gave him a lazy grin and that’s probably what triggered the events that followed.

 

“Let’s get him inside your room ‘Samu.”

 

The three of them all but ran towards Osamu-san’s bedroom, pieces of their clothing strewn on the floor behind them. Kageyama found himself switching in between kisses, to give the twins equal attention. By the time, they plopped against the soft mattress, they were naked as they were on their name-day. Miya-san, not someone to idle around, positioned himself on Kageyama’s lower half and slowly pulled his thighs farther apart, licking on his once again hardened length. Kageyama allowed his eyes to shut close as he savored the feeling, his finger gently playing with the older setter’s fringe. His grip tightened as Miya-san’s sucking quicken and his finger pushed on his hole- it was a strange feeling very much like the first time Miya-san did it but his clear thoughts could now discern the slight pain associated with it. He heard Osamu-san whispered, “Relax. Don’t tighten up,” and Kageyama tried his best to obey, firmly closing his eyes to shut out the pain. As the first finger slid in and Miya-san rhythmically pushed it in and out his asshole, the pain gradually subsided and replaced with nothing but _pleasure_. He gasped and moaned as Miya-san inserted a second finger in, then a third, _stretching him wide_. Kageyama found himself holding the older setter’s face in place whilst rocking his hips in abandon, as the pleasure took him to new heights. His euphoria was interrupted as Osamu-san’s raging length poked him in the cheeks, his dark blue eyes settling on the mischievous smirk playing on the older man’s lips. Kageyama opened his mouth sultrily in invitation and moaned loudly as Osamu-san plunged his penis inside and started moving _hard and fast_ , fucking his face. Their gasps and moans reverberated in the room for quite some time as they took their time pleasuring each other.

 

The sudden intrusion and pain of Miya-san’s cock in his hole brought tears to his eyes, his fingers digging on the soft flesh of Osamu-san’s thighs. He heard Miya-san cursed loudly and cried his name, “Fuck Tobio, you’re just as tight as I remembered.”

 

Miya-san slowly thrusted his length inside him, gripping on his hips firmly as he waited for Kageyama to adjust; when he was sure that Kageyama wasn’t hurting anymore, he plunged himself _repeatedly_ inside him, his tempo growing faster and faster. Osamu-san continued fucking his face, his slender fingers holding his head in place. Kageyama linked his bare thighs on Miya-san’s pelvis, pulling him _further and deeper inside_.

 

“He likes it rough huh?” Osamu-san chuckled, a heavy tint of lust painted on his voice.

 

Miya-san continued plowing him, the sound of their bodies slapping against each other augmenting their libido. Kageyama’s hand fisted on the bedsheet as he ejaculated without warning, his back arching in pleasure. His senpai suddenly lifted his hips from the bed and plunged _harder, faster and deeper_ in his ass, greedily taking pleasure on his body.

 

“Fuck Tobio, I’m cumming.” Kageyama felt the hot liquid spurted inside both his mouth and ass as the twins cum simultaneously, their gasps filling the air. His eyes shot open as he felt them moved away from him, their bodies covered in sweat and smelt of _sex_.

 

“Ass up here Kageyama-kun, on all fours.” Osamu-san commanded, his eyes boring through him.

 

Seeming to have a mind of its own, his body obeyed and assumed a doggy style position, with his ass positioned towards Osamu-san’s side of the bed. Kageyama cried out in surprise as a hard slap connected with his bottom before a sharp thrust plunged Osamu-san deep inside him; his whole body rocked hard as Osamu-san fucked him vigorously, his thighs smacking on Kageyama’s ass everytime he plunged inside.

 

“You’re so tight Kageyama-kun.”

 

Kageyama continued gasping and crying helplessly as Osamu-san continued fucking him from behind, the feeling consuming him _whole- rebuilding him anew_. His eyes sought Miya-san’s and the said man kissed him passionately, their tongues twining and dancing with each other.

 

“I love you, Tobio-kun.” He heard Miya-san confessed just before he came for the third time that night.

 

 _And the growing warm feeling he felt inside grew from then on_.


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A double-update just because you guys are awesome! <3 Thank you for the wonderful comments and sticking with me through it all. ^^

** KAGEYAMA **

Strewn of clothes were piled haphazardly on his bed and floor, the sight deepening the frowning crease in his forehead. He was standing in front of the newly bought dresser mirror in his bedroom, the flustered man reflected off of it was too hard to recognize. Kageyama clucked his tongue for the nth time, scowling deeper and glaring at the smiling stranger in front of him. His dark blue eyes settled on the pair of denim jeans and blue sweater donned on his body, a distasteful taste lurking inside his mouth. With an angry grunt and a sigh, he pulled the sweater over his body and threw it back without a glance, his eyes closing shut in irritation. He was thankful that his mother went out with her friends because he’d surely be scolded without a doubt; he’d been donning and doffing different set of clothes for quite some time now, and _his mother surely, wouldn’t approve of the mess he’d just made._

 

Kageyama pinched the bridge of his nose to reign in his annoyance before opening his eyes, the same set of dark blue eyes looking back at him. His gaze flitted across the faint lines and bite marks painted all over his bare torso, a warm blush finding its way through the tips of his ears and cheekbones. _“I love you Tobio-kun.”_ A groan escaped his lips as the memory flashed unbidden in his thoughts, once again; the confession he’d gotten from his senpai a few weeks back continuously playing inside his mind, _rattling him_. No matter how many times he tried to be indifferent about it, truth is, _he was unsettled- he doesn’t know how to respond_. He indirectly tried to run away to his own cocoon, playing coy and pretending that he didn’t hear it; but the pained eyes and the wry smile Miya-san gave him when he saw him off the Tokyo station told him what he didn’t want to acknowledge, _his senpai knows- he could see through him_.

 

A slow burn lit up his chest as he reminisced the face Miya-san made when he boarded the platform three weeks ago, _it haunted him in his sleep;_ and for some reason, Kageyama didn’t like seeing that look on the older setter’s face _ever_ again.

 

He shook off his head, warding off the unwanted thoughts creeping into his mind and resumed searching for clothes to wear, ignoring the itch to check his phone. He’d agreed to tour Miya-san around Miyagi and to shop for some clothes with him, and he needs to constantly remind himself that _it was not a date; they’re just going to hang out as friends, just like the old times._ He tripped on something as he was hunting for clothes and cursed as his alarm tone blared out, signaling that he was running out of time; with a disbelieving eyes and a silent scream building inside pursed lips, Kageyama grabbed his keys, phone and hastily wore some sweater before running at full speed downstairs- realizing too late that he’d just donned _the borrowed sweater from Miya-san_.

***

Kageyama stopped running and hunched over for a while, catching his breath. His heart beats so fast and he wasn’t quite sure if it’s because of the run he’d just had or something else entirely. They agreed on meeting in front of his old school Karasuno by 12 noon, and even though he’s not looking at his cell phone screen, he knew he was running late. He gulped one lungful of air and sprinted forwards, bypassing the familiar scenery and ignoring the calls from the passersby. He only slowed down when he viewed the familiar yellow fringe of Miya Atsumu’s head and made his way towards him, trying his best to even out his breathing. He scowled when the older setter suddenly looked towards his direction and waved happily, his face beaming. He tried to control the sudden fluttering inside his chest but failed when Miya-san jogged towards him, the smile not leaving his face.

 

“You could’ve just walked to here, I don’t mind you being late. I’m not going anywhere.”

 

“I did not run,” he lied, his breathlessness exposing him. “Shut it.” Kageyama glared when he saw the smirk playing on the older setter’s face.

 

“If you said so,” Miya-san relented and suddenly hugged him, his minty scent filling Kageyama’s nostrils. “My sweatshirt looks good on you.”

 

His eyes widened at the statement and realized just now what he’d just wore, cursing as his cheeks blushed a rosy color. He tried to scramble for a retort but his thoughts were all over the place and when he was about to open his mouth, Miya-san pressed his lips gently against his. “I missed you,” he whispered.

 

Kageyama was stunned and frozen in place, his mind not catching up. He heard the older setter chuckled at the silly face he’s probably making by now and allowed himself to be dragged as Miya-san entwined their fingers together. His face remained aflame as they started treading towards the shopping district close to Karasuno High School, his dark blue eyes fixated on their interlocked hands. He spent the rest of the day trailing after Miya-san as he entered the shops one by one, not letting go of his hand. He was uncomfortable at first at the curious eyes following them -without a doubt recognizing who they were- but the incessant light touches, small talks and soft kisses Miya-san rained on him whenever he had the chance bit by bit stripped Kageyama of his insecurities, and he found himself enjoying his time. He caught himself laughing when his senpai made a fool of himself and glared quickly when his senpai looked at him, realizing his mistake.

 

He had the silly urge to stick his tongue out when Miya-san answered with a playful laugh of his own, the fluttering in his chest once again attacking in full bloom. They continued wandering inside the mall, buying some sports gear, checking out newly stocked shoes for volleyball and indulging themselves in the food court.

 

It was dark outside by the time they finished, a couple of paper bags hung on their free hands. They walked silently hand in hand towards the train station, their hands still entwined. Kageyama had the nagging feeling of not wanting to let go of his senpai’s hand just yet as their steps brought them closer bit by bit to the platform. He was grateful that Miya-san didn’t bring up the topic about his confession and their _supposed to be an arrangement_ with Osamu-san but Kageyama knew that it was cowardly him, _he was running away again- too scared of what ifs_. He glared to no one in particular as the bitter feeling started to engulf him and it was Miya Atsumu who saved him _once again from himself_ \- he halted suddenly and kissed him full in the mouth, their breaths mingling and puffing in the cold night air.

 

“Take care on your way home, see you soon at practice Tobio-kun.”

 

He watched with bated breath as Miya-san’s back slowly receded, being swallowed by the swarm of people inside the train station. He rubbed his chest angrily as a dull ache spread on it insidiously and almost stumbled back when he realized that _he was hurting inside, not because of Oikawa-san but because of a certain fox named_ Miya Atsumu.


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heads up: A long chapter up ahead. :]
> 
> Am I going too fast or too slow with the pacing of the story? Let me know your thoughts. Thank you as always for the wonderful support.
> 
> Enjoy~

** KAGEYAMA **

Kageyama spiked the ball so hard that he was afraid if it would shatter his carpal bones and shoulder for a moment. He couldn’t remove the usual glare and frown on his face and it kept on deepening as he continued taking note of the stares and idle chatters around him. He liked to believe that he was being overly paranoid but his gut told him otherwise; the team’s in a gossip fest over the supposed to be rivalry of Oikawa Tooru and Miya Atsumu over him. He was never quite comfortable with anyone taking notice of him and the uncalled for attention was doing nothing but testing his patience. The chills he got in the morning should’ve warned him of what was about to happen but like anything else in life, _he’s downright gullible and stupid when it comes to these things_.

 

He knew that he was being overly conscious towards Miya-san and that he was inadvertently distancing himself from the other genius setter but he couldn’t help it; whenever they were in close proximity with each other or within talking distance, he could feel the heaviness in those stares _tripled_ and it was suffocating him at best.

 

The trajectory of the ball hit a little over the back line and Kageyama’s scowl deepened, the loud clucking of his tongue bounced off the gym. He could see Miya-san across the net, doing a thumbs up and a _don’t-mind_ smile but he answered him with a glower- the embarrassment fueling his actions as he tried to hide the blush creeping up his cheeks. He saw him tried to cross over to him but a shout from their coach stopped him in his advances and Kageyama was a little bit disappointed.

 

His body stiffened as he sensed Oikawa-san approached him, almost forgetting that his previous captain was on the same practice team as him. He even surprised himself on the fewer times he thought of his senpai these past few weeks but seeing him always, always sends his mind into a _chaotic mess_. He was never quite sure of how to act around him even from the start, he would always grow stoic and stiff, eager to show off his increasing prowess in setting just so he could stand on the same ground as him; but this time, it was different, Kageyama doesn’t know what he wanted anymore, he doesn’t even remember how to converse with Oikawa-san. _And that thought pains him_.

 

“You have to learn to shut everyone else out when playing volleyball Tobio-chan,” Oikawa-san started, his eyes looking at him sympathetically. Kageyama couldn’t help the slight tingle on his toes when his senpai addressed him casually and outright but the tingle doesn’t _jolt_ him anymore, more than anything it seems to be a _habit_ his body developed whenever Oikawa Tooru’s near him. “If they want to gossip let them be, it shouldn’t affect how you play. Just focus.” He blinked hard when Oikawa-san patted him on the back before resuming his post, his body was once again geared for the play.

 

Kageyama just nodded in answer absentmindedly, the place where his senpai touched him seemed to burn in mild heat. He was sure his whole body was beet red by now, the stares intensified but he tried his best to follow Oikawa-san’s advice. The simple gesture put a huge lump in his throat, his eyes burning hot but he succeeded in reining it in; _he has no idea what’s making him so emotional_ , or maybe he did but he just refused to dwell on it for now. He shook his head to clear off his thoughts, adamant on not disgracing himself further and breaking Oikawa-san’s trust and crouched low, eyes keen on the ball across the net. He barely saw the approving smile of their coach as his focus skyrocketed when the game resumed, his body following the usual drills in smooth pattern as he relaxed and let go, the tension slowly easing.

 

He found his rhythm as time went past, his precision escalating as the tips of his fingers made contact with the ball many times than he could count. It really was a big factor to have Ushijima-san on the same side even just for a practice game, the older ace seemed to have an indispensable amount of energy for jumping. The undeniable synchronization he has with Oikawa-san when it comes to setting was highlighted in the game, their collaboration putting a small smile on Kageyama’s face- the _nostalgia_ was too much to bear. It took him years to stand beside his senpai on the same court, it took him years _to be recognized by him_ ; and although they’d been in the same team for two years, it was only now that Kageyama truly felt that his prowess in setting was acknowledged by Oikawa-san. _Finally, he was looking at him_.

 

The game continued, the points their team racked increasing and the margin widening as compared to the other team. Kageyama was exhilarated, he missed playing and practicing with players far greater in skills than he is, but more than anything he liked the idea of getting ahead of the Miya Atsumu x Kiyoomi Sakusa combination- when the two of the team were on the same side, _they were indisputably formidable_. He couldn’t remember a time when he’d defeated that combination, when they were on the other side of the net and Kageyama, was hoping that it would be the first time, they succeeded.

 

The set-up of the other team kept on surging and heightening despite the shouts from their coach to ‘Slow down’ and Kageyama couldn’t help but zeroed-in his gaze on Miya-san. His eyes widened when he noticed the older setter staring at him at the same time he did, his expression hard and unreadable. All semblance of focus seemed to vanish from him as his thoughts went into disarray, Kageyama was sure that Miya-san was angry but he wasn’t quite sure what makes him so and that disturbed him. His mind started thinking of scenarios and other irrelevant thoughts that it was too late when he finally heard the shouts of alarm around him, the ball hit him square in the face and boy, was it so damn painful.

 

He tasted blood even before he realized that his nose was dripping; whoever spiked the ball sure has placed a huge force on it and it was Kageyama’s carelessness that placed him on its receiving end. Their teammates swarmed around him but Miya-san and Oikawa-san were the first ones to reach him.

 

“Tobio-kun, are you alright? I’m sorry.” Miya-san rasped breathlessly, his fingers drawing small soothing circles on his back.

 

“I’m fine, it was just a scratch. Don’t mind it.” He tried for a smile, to pacify the panicking Miya-san but he only managed a grimace, his face aching from the movement.

 

“You need some ice to halt the swelling,” Oikawa-san started, standing close but not in touching distance to him. Kageyama’s eyes swung over him and he noticed for the first time the somber look pasted on his face this whole time. “Let’s get you some ice Tobio.”

 

The fingers on his back stilled upon the remark and a single firm press pushed Kageyama closer to Miya-san’s side, his sweaty scent comforting to the growing uneasiness he’s feeling. “ _I’ll_ be the one to assist him,” his senpai stated rather brusquely, his whole stance defensive.

 

“Aren’t you the cause of this? You were brooding and seething so much that this happened Atsumu-chan, cool down for a bit. I’ll take Tobio-chan. Here take this handkerchief.” Kageyama could feel the series of protests Miya-san wanted to say but he knew that the older setter couldn’t deny the rationality behind Oikawa-san’s words no matter how much he hates it. He could feel him resigned dejectedly as his touch on his back turned cold even before Ushijima-san intervened. Upon their coach’s approval, Oikawa-san inclined his head for him to follow and Kageyama consented, risking one glance back to Miya-san whose face was once again hard to decipher.

 

Their steps echoed in the empty corridor as they traversed the way towards the clinic at the left corner side of the building. Kageyama was still holding the hanky against his nostrils, the dripping almost subsiding by now. He found himself watching Oikawa-san’s large strides in front of him and it made him reminisce about those times he kept on tailing his senpai around Kitagawa Daichi, obsessed with being _noticed_. Maybe it would always be like this, Oikawa-san before him and he, following in his senpai’s footsteps; maybe, they weren’t meant to walk _side by side_ and although the idea was dampening his mood, it doesn’t pierce him as much as it used to. His senpai might have recognized him as a setter of the same standing a while ago but he wasn’t quite sure if that applies to the other aspects as well; he was once again _growing distant towards him_.  Kageyama was afraid to break the silence, he was cautious of shattering their fragile truce and so he let the silence be, enveloping them whole-leaving them in their own thoughts.

 

He watched Oikawa-san knocked on the whitewashed door and when no one answered, pushed it open- the dimmed lights inside telling them that the doctor-in-charge was not in. His senpai pushed the door wider and clicked the lights on and Kageyama followed meekly inside, conscious of how he must act. Oikawa-san pointed him to the nearby chair as he continued ransacking the place, searching for the cold packs and band-aids. He watched him moved with elegance and familiarity inside the clinic and it fascinated Kageyama in a way.

 

“Here, place this above your head and cheek. Your cheeks starting to bruise,” His senpai pointed out. Kageyama stretched out his hand to get the materials and wordlessly applied it to where Oikawa-san said he should put it. His senpai tinkered with a few more cabinets before succeeding in getting the band-aid and settled himself across from him, his dark brown eyes looking at him intently.

 

“You seemed happy,” Oikawa-san started, playing with the box of plaster on his hand. Kageyama remained silent, unsure of where the conversation is going. Being alone should’ve made him happy but he was anything but _wary and prudent_. With Oikawa-san, he doesn’t know what he thinks, he’s very _unpredictable_ and Kageyama needs to always be on guard. “Are you happy?”

 

The question caught him off guard so much that Kageyama was stunned and frozen for a moment, chewing on his thoughts. He wasn’t sure if he was happy but he knew deep down, that he was _okay_ \- that he was doing better than he’d hope. He was still thinking of what ifs and what nots when it comes to Oikawa-san but he’s peaceful than he’s ever been for the past seven years. He knew that he was still _in love with him_ , that a part of him would always hold Oikawa-san close to his heart, but he doesn’t crave for him as much as he used to, _and that confuses the hell out of him_. His conflicting emotions must’ve shown on his face since his senpai laughed softly, the _melancholy_ making his chest ache.

 

“You don’t need to answer that, I know Atsumu’s being good to you.” Oikawa-san teased, a small smile playing on his lips. Kageyama averted his eyes when the discomfort was slowly growing on him, his cheeks a deep shade of red; this reminds him of how rattled he was being in the same room as his senpai when he finally admitted to himself that he is _madly and irrevocably in love with the best setter at the Miyagi Prefecture_.

 

“I don’t mean to be nasty and rude to you,” his senpai continued, his gaze far away. “At first, I resented you for being born with the skills it took me years and effort to cultivate. You seem to be better at grasping things than I’ll ever be and you learn fast, which irked me in so many ways than you could imagine. I am a petty person in nature as what Hajime always told me and that’s probably what drove me to single you out. Despite the teasing and insults I threw at you, you still managed to be kind to me and that made me feel bad and kept on wanting to make you feel worse in the process. I could see you working hard and practicing hard to hone your skills despite being a genius when it comes to setting; it should’ve moved me, and I’m sure it did at some point, but my jealousy won me over and so I continued detesting you though it was slowly fading bit by bit as I spent more time watching you.”

 

“It was in my first year in junior high school when I noticed that I was in love with my best friend. I told him outright that I liked him, that I wanted us to be together, and truth be told I thought that it would work out. Who wouldn’t want to be with me? _I am_ Oikawa Tooru, the best setter in the Miyagi Prefecture. When Hajime-san rejected me, I was stunned and it was at that time that I had my first heartbreak. I played around to patch my blemished heart and continued my act of joking around- acting normal around him, but it was hard. It _feels like I’m drowning,_ I knew I was slowly being emptied out from the inside. No one knew that I was gay and so my façade continued; I thought it was better to _love him from afar than not to love him at all_. So imagine my surprise when you confessed to me Tobio-chan.” A wry smile graced Oikawa-san’s face.

 

“I was ecstatic at first upon hearing your confession but with it comes my arrogance and pride. I rejected you outright, the same thing Hajime did with me, and although it sounds like a douche move, that mere act lifted off something inside of me. I knew you wouldn’t easily give up on me just as much as I couldn’t easily _give up on him_ and I found myself doing to you the same things that are being done to me. Seeing you hurt, again and again, allowed me to heal myself piece by piece, it made me feel _not alone-_ that I was not the only one having his heart shattered. I realized too late that I went overboard and despite that, I still couldn’t break the habit of making you cry and feeding my ego. So if you’re wondering if you ever did something to make me hate you, the answer is no Tobio-chan, it was all on me. I’m just a _broken piece of trash_. I’m sorry. Don’t cry.”

 

Kageyama didn’t realize that he was crying hard by now, the squeezing and heaviness in his chest were too much to bear. He was glad that Oikawa-san opened up himself to him but his heart _splintered one last time_. His confession of not ever getting over Iwaizumi-san hits so close to home and it was only now, that Kageyama tried to come to terms with the fact that the person _he’s been in love with all this time would never love him back_.

 

“You’re just as broken as I am but you are no trash Oikawa-san,” he heard himself say, still wanting to soothe the older setter’s wounds. “If I’m slowly healing, I’m sure you will too-

 

A sudden kiss halted his words and the tangy taste of Oikawa-san’s lips told him that he too was crying. They said that a kiss from your true love _sparks_ and this one surely didn’t, it was _sloppy and clumsy at best_. It was slow and awkward at first but as their emotions and unsaid _goodbyes and regrets_ fueled them from deep within, the kiss grew deep and heavy. Kageyama held on to Oikawa-san for dear life, his tongue locking with his senpai’s, pouring his _frustrations, heartaches, and remorse_. He knew that this would be the first and the last consensual kiss he’d share with his first love, _a kiss of death_.

 

Maybe you really don’t need to be with the person you’re _head over heels_ in love with, you just need someone to love you just as much as you love them. And it made Kageyama rethink about his feelings with the Miya brothers.


	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is sort of a short filler chapter. Sorry for the late update, I've been very busy these days. Hoping you're all having a good day! :]

**KAGEYAMA**

He was looking blankly at the ceiling of his room, his eyes tracing the undecipherable patterns on it, trying to make sense of what he was seeing. He refused to close his eyes, not ready to see the jumbled images of the past days floating on his mind and definitely not ready to face what he’s been feeling this whole time. His fingers softly touched his lips, absentmindedly outlining its patterns; an image of his brunette senpai immediately came into focus and Kageyama furiously shook his head, willing the thoughts to go away. He was sure that he was blushing hard, the memory of the kiss they’d shared ingrained in him, but thinking about it doesn’t make his chest flutter like it was supposed to do; if anything, _he just feels embarrassed_. He could feel a slight breeze inside his chest, like the feel of mildew from the rain, and it was _pleasantly relieving_ when he thought about the goodbye they’ve just had.

 

Thinking of Oikawa Tooru made him think of Miya Atsumu and his chest squeezed painfully as he reminisced the pained and dejected face the older setter wore when he rushed inside the clinic and saw them kissing. He could vividly remember the questioning brown eyes staring straight at him and the unsaid betrayal in those orbs before he walked away; but Kageyama could all but sat there stupidly, his whole body paralyzed, _in total shock_. Oikawa-san was the first one to react, standing frantically and making the effort of chasing after Miya-san but Kageyama restrained him, lightly shaking his head when his senpai’s apologetic eyes sought him. He could remember how hard his nails dug deep on Oikawa-san’s as he continued sitting there, his conflicted emotions threatening to drown him and he was thankful for the silence that enveloped them as his old love passively supported him.

 

For the nth time that day, Kageyama’s hand reached for the mobile phone on his bedside table, his fingers mechanically touching the home button and his eyes staring at the panel- still _no messages from Miya-san_. He rolled over, pressing his face hard on the pillow and screamed, the frustrations and regrets eating away at him. Kageyama was tempted to call Miya-san- to explain, but there was nothing to explain; what happened between Oikawa-san and he belongs only to them; at least that’s what he thought but he refused to give meaning to the gnawing ache in his chest, _he was stubborn that way_. He’d been thinking about his mischievous senpai frequently than he’d liked and although it was unsettling at first, he did not dislike it. He wasn’t sure when was it that Miya-san dug a bigger existence inside of him but Kageyama could feel the aftertaste of the ache his absence has created; he wasn’t sure if this is love, but he was _at least_ sure that he like Miya-san enough to get this hurt by him.

 

He stayed in that position longer, his thoughts battling each other and that’s the exact same position Hinata saw him in as the shorter guy burst through his room, his loud voice popping his sanctuary. He felt the brushing of his sheets as Hinata plopped himself beside him quietly, his wriggling hitting Kageyama lightly on the sides.

 

“What’s going on with you these past days?”

 

“Nothing,” Kageyama lied, refusing to face the orange-haired guy. Hinata was surprisingly perceptive and Kageyama didn’t want to talk about his worries, the shorter guy has too much on his plate right now as it is and he refused to add more to his pile.

 

He heard Hinata sigh heavily and was forced to listen quietly as he told him off, “You might not think that you deserve to be loved Kageyama but you do. What happened with the Grand King is just a product of misfortune, maybe you were never meant to be together but it doesn’t mean that you should stop looking for love. I wouldn’t force you if you won’t tell me but I’ll always be here to listen, waiting. Get up, we need to pack, your bus is arriving soon.”

 

He was scowling when he finally met Hinata’s eyes, the former smiling at him knowingly. Kageyama hit him lightly in the arm and together they filled up his ransack just in time for the bus arrival. Hinata saw him off and wished him luck and with a trembling heart Kageyama stepped foot on his team’s bus, they’ll be having a week long training camp in preparation for the next few games they’ll be having.

 

His eyes sought the familiar foxy brown eyes of Miya-san and he stopped dead in his tracks when he saw him looking at him at his seat. Kageyama wasn’t sure if he should smile or greet him, he was just happy to see him right now. He steeled his mind to approach him when Miya-san suddenly averted his gaze and ignored him, the unexpected pang in his chest making him almost stumbled back. He glared to no one in particular and took up the empty seat on the back, surprisingly seated beside Oikawa-san. His senpai greeted him with a wry smile and Kageyama answered shyly. His eyes wandered on the front and locked with Miya-san’s steely gaze and Kageyama prayed that _nothing will go wrong with this weeklong trip_.


	20. Chapter 20

** KAGEYAMA **

His fingers trembled slightly as he tried to make himself comfortable on his seat, Miya-san’s disconcerting stare a while ago and the heat of Oikawa-san beside him was almost too much for Tobio’s chaotic mind to take. He longed to talk with someone, almost wishing that he had Hinata beside him right now, but smartly chose to keep quiet. There was something melancholy about Oikawa-san’s stance as he gazed distantly at the window, his brown eyes glossed over. Kageyama had the urge to comfort him, more than a hundred percent sure that Iwaizumi-san’s to blame, but reined himself in. Everything about his senpai’s stature screams _back off_ and Kageyama didn’t need to be told twice to do just that; more than anything, he was skeptical and cautious in approaching Oikawa-san thanks to a certain fox-eyed man.

 

Thinking of the older setter made Kageyama risked another glance at the front, his eyes wandering towards the back of Miya-san’s head, wishing he knew what he was thinking. If he’ll be honest with himself, the earlier brush off cut him deeper than it should have, his chest still twisting in agony. He knew he deserved that, no one really wanted to see his lover kissing someone else, but Kageyama wasn’t his lover in the first place- Miya-san _never asked him to_. And it was only now that Kageyama felt that he’d agree to it if only _he’d asked him first_. He scowled in irritation as his emotions got jumbled and twisted, finding himself getting angry at Miya-san too for not trying enough; for all his talk and _bravado_ about never letting go of Kageyama, he sure did give up far too quickly, and Kageyama found himself wondering if he isn’t just worth the time and effort to be _chased_.

 

He felt them, even before he saw the curious gazes of his teammates surreptitiously bouncing on the strange arrangement of the three, without a doubt fueling their wildest imaginations. Someone whispered on Miya-san’s ear and before he looked back at his direction, Kageyama quickly averted his gaze- feeling his chest _pounding loudly and painfully_. Shame and embarrassment feeling him, he all but yanked his backpack open and retrieved his iPod inside, shutting everything out and closing his eyes, hoping to somehow lighten the heavy feeling in his chest.

 

His usual glare decorated his face when he felt someone nudged him awake, the song still playing in a loop; he pouted involuntarily when he saw Oikawa-san’s laughing face- somewhat regaining some of his usual playfulness- and lazily hit him softly in the stomach, realizing his mistake too late when he felt daggers thrown his way; _they looked like they were flirting_. He warily looked towards the front and saw Miya-san looking at them impassively, the hard set of his mouth the only tell-tale sign of his bottled up anger. Panicking, Kageyama hurriedly pulls off his headphones and hurriedly went after Miya-san, who was getting off the bus by now. He almost tripped over his own feet but caught himself on the last minute and quickly followed Miya-san inside the small mall their bus had stopped to for a break.

 

The old setter walked with ease, his long strides easily creating more distance between the still groggy Kageyama, and he couldn’t help but admire and curse Miya-san’s long legs as he tried to catch up with him. He was painfully aware of the gazes following them but he was too focused on Miya-san to truly give much thought on it. Throwing all caution out of the window, he ran after his senpai and hold his arm to stop him. Not missing a beat, Miya-san disentangled himself from Kageyama’s hold- piercing something inside of him- and dragged him towards a corner, surprising the black-haired beauty.

 

“Miya-san, wait-“ His words were rudely cut off when Miya Atsumu pushed him rather roughly against the wall and silenced him with a kiss, angrily pushing his tongue into his mouth. Kageyama squirmed helplessly and tried to push off the older man, afraid that they will be seen, but his senpai didn’t budge- seeming _not to care_ \- and restrained him against him as he furiously claimed Kageyama’s lips for his own. Softening a bit, his body responding positively on this man he knew he now came to care about, Kageyama loosened his stance and accepted the punishing assault Miya-san was giving him, getting aroused as he confirmed that his senpai still cared about _him_. They kissed for a while, putting all their frustrations, regrets and anger on it, and stopped, their breaths mingling together.

 

Kageyama involuntarily closed his eyes as he felt a light kiss on his forehead, his heart fluttering in answer at the gentle gesture, feeling like he would cry. He felt like beating himself up for his error in judgment, he should’ve run after Miya-san when he caught them kissing, he should’ve at least _explained_ ; his arrogance doesn’t seem to be that much important and worth losing Miya-san for. Resolving himself to try to at least clear the misunderstanding between them, Kageyama opened his mouth but was once again cut short by the older setter.

 

“Why?” The simple question paralyzed Kageyama on the spot, the whispered anguish intoned on that word telling him that nothing is _settled_ between the two of them yet. “Is it so unacceptable to love me Tobio? Haven’t I given you enough? Why would you betray me?”

 

Kageyama was at a loss for words, not really knowing what to answer. He knew he ought to say something to pacify Miya-san but he couldn’t bring himself to vocalize his thoughts when his mind was _blank_ in the first place. Instead, he tried to reach for his senpai, wanting to comfort him with his touch when _words failed him_. Miya-san held him at bay, his fingers digging deep into his skin.

“Maybe I should stop pursuing you,” Kageyama’s heart seemed to stop at the statement, his eyes snapping wide in alarm. He saw Miya-san watching him, his reaction pulling a sad, wry smile on his face. “You’re so cruel, Tobio,” he whispered one last time before turning his back on him.

 


	21. Chapter 21

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So sorry for the once again late update; life's been shitty lately. Here's a very short chapter, hoping you'll enjoy it. :}

** ATSUMU **

He busied himself with looking mindlessly at the rack of chips, trying hard to dissolve the pained image of Tobio in his mind. He never planned to hurt the younger setter, never planned to put the kind of face he’d just consciously made him wore. He wanted to curse at himself, he wanted to go back outside, he wanted to embrace Tobio; so many things he wanted but Atsumu knew that he couldn’t act on any of it, _he was hurt and he was afraid of unconsciously causing more rift between them_. He was angry, yes, and Atsumu was afraid of what he might do- _he was wary of himself_.

 

Atsumu saw Ushijima-san looked his way from across the rack, his brows crunching in confusion- probably wondering at the tension between him and Kageyama- for all his prowess in volleyball, he sure could be dense at times. He lightly shook his head, not really in the mood to talk with someone, and continued looking for something to buy, his mind kept on drifting between Kageyama and the kiss he’d witnessed days ago; thinking of how close the two had been always seemed to knock the air out of his lungs and he found himself closing his eyes a little harder, willing the image to disappear. Truth be told, it was taking everything in him to not confront Oikawa Tooru and beat the shit out of him, he could see him looking his way at times- an apologetic glint reflecting off of his eyes- and maybe, that’s partly the reason why he could restrain himself a little bit more.

 

The jangling of the trinket hanging by the door snatched Atsumu’s thoughts, his gaze shifting towards the front, eyes hardening slightly as he noticed Tobio standing by the doorway. He couldn’t help but noticed the littlest of things- the smudge of redness underneath the younger setter’s eyes, the way his body slumped dejectedly- as if in pain and regret, the confused and slightly perturbed way his eyes scanned the small convenient store- and it was taking every bit of effort and restraint inside of him to not do what his body was screaming at him, _rush to his kouhai’s side and kiss his worries away_. No matter how much he desires and loves Tobio, the last memory he had of him cut him deeper than he should’ve allowed- _Tobio ripped him apart into splinters_ \- and Atusmu, for the first time, found himself wondering and doubting if he could ever look at Tobio the same way again, _if he could ever put his trust undeniably in him, again_.

 

The wounds were still fresh, _festering and eating away at him_ ; the longer Tobio refused to come after him and explain whatever the fuck he saw back at the school clinic, the angrier and more betrayed he felt. He used to lie down on his bed for the past couple of days, playing out the scene of Tobio and Oikawa Tooru kissing each other passionately, consciously beating himself _over and over again_ and wishing that Tobio went after him the moment he runs; without meaning to, Atsumu concluded that maybe Tobio would never see him the way he wanted to and that he’ll never look at him the same way he looks at Oikawa-san; and although the thoughts were disconcerting at best, with it awakened the dark feelings stirring inside of him- _the side of him that calls for retribution, the side of him that wanted to punish Tobio and made him submit to him fully._

He could feel the first tide of his dark thoughts rising, images of Tobio bound naked, writhing helplessly and begging for release underneath him clouding his rationality, _tempting him to act_. The moment Tobio’s eyes met his, Atsumu hurriedly averted his eyes and went towards the counter, dumping his scavenged snacks and careful to cast a glance in his kouhai’s side; he was eager to get on the bus and keep some distance between them, his heart pounding furiously and his skin getting clammy as the need to drag Tobio in a dark place and take pleasure in his body, _his dick pounding mercilessly inside of him_ , steadily and progressively rose within him.

 

Atsumu all but ran towards the front door as he was handed his bag, bypassing Tobio rather brusquely; not really meaning to be mean or anything, he subconsciously shoved the younger setter rather hardly when his heat came into contact with his, feeding _the demon inside_. He refused to look back as he continued trudging towards their bus, his insides recoiling in a bad way; he knew even without seeing that he had once again hurt the one person he swore he would never hurt and it cuts him deeply _more than he could take_. He resented himself for breaking that promise but he resented Oikawa-san more for causing this large rift between Tobio and him.

 

Upon reaching their vehicle, Atsumu avoided the questioning eyes of those who stayed behind and chose instead to silently dump his sorry-ass on the seat, his conflicted feelings causing him a headache. He tried to calm his nerves by closing his eyes, breathing slowly _in and out_ to regain his bearings, but once again failed- the same image of Tobio and Oikawa-san kissing poisoning his psyche. His fingernails dug hard on his skin, a small drop of blood pooling, as a sudden rush of anger so palpable gripped him. Atsumu had never felt this furious and mad in his _entire life_ and truth be told, it scared the shit out of him. Tobio seemed to bring both the worst and the best qualities of him.

 

He desperately tried to replace the image with that of Tobio sucking him eagerly, his lust-filled eyes looking at him honestly, but no matter how many times he thought of that it always came back to the image of Tobio with Oikawa-san; and it left Atsumu wondering, _when will it ever stop hurting?_

 


	22. Chapter 22

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally, I was able to steal time from my chaotic schedule. Thank you for being patient with me and sticking with this story through and through. I hope this chapter was able to satisfy some of your cravings for more. Thank you so much and as always, let me know your thoughts. You're all amazing. :X

** KAGEYAMA **

His cheeks burned in embarrassment and indignation as he tried to walk steadily, careful to trip over his feet and hold on to whatever dignity he was left with as he felt his insides churning. Kageyama felt small and weak, the need to hide himself making him nauseous; without meaning to, his mind drifted off to the painful memory of his last year at Kitagawa Daichii, when his teammates turned their backs on him, and the anxiety that ate away at him back then was threatening to drag him down along with it again. He swallowed hard and dug his nails at the skin of his palm as he fought off the need to vomit, more than anything else, Kageyama hates baring his weakness to others and he wouldn’t start anytime soon.

 

He is conflicted with himself; he wanted to feel angry and sorry to the older setter, he wanted to punish and be punished in return. Kageyama could only close his eyes in agony as he realized how huge an existence and influence the fox-eyed setter had become in his life. He knew he ought to talk with him soon if he was hoping to ever regain the intimacy between them. He thought he was ready to explain his side but Kageyama wasn’t sure what went wrong.

 

From the corner of his eyes, he saw the lean figure of Sakusa Kiyoomi cautiously approaching him and Kageyama walked faster to escape the interrogation he knew would be happening. He all but ran as he saw their bus and breathe a huge sigh of relief as the doors opened; but it was cut too soon as he felt the tense atmosphere inside. He subconsciously sneaked a glance towards Miya-san’s direction, noting the hard set of his eyes and jaws as he was looking out the window _away from_ him, and concluded that his senpai was refusing to even look his way; dejectedly and with his chest squeezing painfully, Kageyama walked towards his seat and was just a tad bit surprised to see Oikawa-san already sitting there. The questioning glint in those hazel eyes and the minute movement of those lips told Kageyama what he wanted to know but refused him all the same, shaking his head a little bit angrily and staying silent throughout the ride. He felt guilty for his misplaced frustrations and anger but knew that nothing will change even if he rants to Oikawa-san, if anything the rift he created between Miya-san and him would only probably deepen and widen. He was thinking of ways to salvage what was left of his relationship with Miya-san, he even thought of contacting Osamu-san, but all his thoughts ended rather badly and so he focused on calming himself, careful not to tap the growing anxiety inside of him.

 

The bus skidded to a stop in front of a large building, the sight of it triggering Kageyama’s anxiety just a bit and almost nullifying his patched-up quietude. He was certain that this weeklong training camp would be _hell_ but what he was unsure of was how _well he would fare if all he could think of is Miya Atsumu_. Kageyama refused to dwell on why he was so concern and hurt about Miya-san’s cold treatment of him, he had an inkling of what the reason was but was still uncertain if he could _take it_.

 

The once _almost_ tranquil atmosphere inside the bus was shattered when chatters and excited whispers filled the air, everyone preparing to get off the bus. Kageyama did the same and tentatively haul his duffel bag, unsure of what to do next and stood at his place stupidly for quite some time. He watched stoically as his teammates streamed off the bus, trying to imbibe the excited energy they were emitting but failing _just the same_. His eyes sought Miya-san’s figure and noticed how still he was sitting on his seat. Kageyama was wondering if he was sleeping and if so, would it be alright for him to shake him awake? He panicked when he noticed that almost all of his teammates were off the vehicle except for him, Miya-san and Oikawa-san. He could still not make up his mind on what to do and decided to look Oikawa-san’s way for help; to his surprise and dismay, Oikawa-san lightly brushed against him and started walking down the aisle, leaving him and his chaotic thoughts be. He found himself absentmindedly watching his senpai’s retreating figure for a while; and when he steeled himself to approach Miya-san, started to follow after Oikawa-san. Kageyama was caught off guard when Miya-san stood up abruptly from his seat and purposefully bumped Oikawa-san rather roughly as he alighted the bus. Did Miya-san wait just to do that or did he just wake up and still did that?

 

Anxiety and dread ate away at him as he thought of how long this training camp would be; he was certain that sooner or later, a fight would ensue between the two older setter and it was up to him to stop them and to at least try to clear the misunderstanding he’d consciously made. Kageyama didn’t regret kissing back Oikawa-san, he felt that it was needed- to have a sense of closure to the unrequited feelings he’d harbored for years- and in a way, the kiss had pacified his raging emotions. What he did regret was not going after Miya-san when he saw them and allowing the silence and misunderstanding between them to grow; and no matter how he wished to turn back time and right his wrong, it’s useless- _he’s already reaping what he sow_.

 

Kageyama threw an apologetic look towards Oikawa-san as they got off the bus, carefully putting an acceptable distance between them as he was sorting out himself. Many pairs of eyes followed them as they walked and Kageyama threw them a glare as he felt suffocated by those stares. Thankfully, upon reaching the receiving area of the building, their focus was diverted as their coach started calling out names and assigning them to room numbers. He felt his heart pounded loudly as he heard his name called after Miya-san’s and the excitement he felt was short-lived when Oikawa-san’s name followed suit. Kageyama wanted to scream and shout at their coach for putting the three of them on the same room; it was hard enough for him in dealing with either of them but dealing with them both at the same time was _suicide_. The room was abuzz by the announcement and he wanted to hide and disappear from the spot. Miya-san took the key holder from their coach and started walking confidently towards their room amidst the noise and chatter; he watched Oikawa-san’s elegant figure followed suit and Kageyama tried to imitate the both of them, glaring rather furiously as he grew uncomfortable by the stares.

 

They stopped at Room _369_ and Kageyama halted by the open door as he saw the double bed inside. He watched as Miya-san and Oikawa-san walked towards opposite beds and started upchucking their things over it silently, the tension in the room was palpable. He found himself unsure as to where to go, feeling unwanted for the _nth time_ in his life. Kageyama was contemplating borrowing a futon from the reception area and sleeping on the floor when Oikawa-san raised his head towards him and beckoned him with a slight turn of his head; thankful but wary and still cautious, he lightly treaded towards Oikawa-san’s direction when a hard but gentle tug on the arm halt him from his tracks. His eyes glossed over as he caught Miya-san’s softening look and offered him a timid smile in return; conflicted on where to sleep now, Kageyama opened his mouth in protest when Miya-san took his duffel bag from him and threw it on his bed, some of his playfulness showing. Feeling panicked and guilty, he threw a glance on the opposite side of the room and saw Oikawa-san’s reassuring smile and shrug. Silently, the three of them worked over their things until a chiming of the bell signaled them of their coach’s summoning.

 

“I’ll be going ahead Tobio-chan,” his senpai said as he walked out the door and threw him a sharp look and a surreptitious side glance towards Miya-san. Kageyama nodded slightly and was thankful that Oikawa-san gave them space, he knew it was now or never and this might be his _only chance to clear the misunderstanding between them_.

 

Kageyama was still composing his thoughts and gathering his courage to explain when Miya-san stood suddenly and started walking towards the door, his long strides creating a large gap between; panicking and not knowing what to do Kageyama blurted the first thing that comes to his mind, “ I love you Miya-san.”


	23. Chapter 23

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, I am sorry for the super late upload; so many things have happened and life sure has a funny way of keeping me busy. T.T Thank you for sticking with me through and through. :}

** KAGEYAMA **

The moment he uttered those words, Kageyama reeled back so hard that he almost tumbled down on the bed. The weight of that statement caused his knees to shake as he realized how genuine he meant it. His thoughts were chaotic, the pessimist in him- the part of him that was _used to being rejected_ , rearing its ugly head, tempting him with its seductive voice, making him want to take back everything he’d just said; but he stayed put, maybe from _shock_ or maybe he was _just tired of running away from himself_. Kageyama wasn’t certain when it was that he allowed himself to fall in love with the older setter, maybe it was from that time when Miya-san found and nursed the broken him or from that time when Miya-san incessantly played games on him; but right now, he could feel his heart and his head full of Miya Atsumu- like a plugged dam suddenly bursting.

 

“I love you,” he whispered once again, to validate and acknowledge his feelings; and although he was wary and uncertain at most, he could feel the giddiness of the reality slowly overflowing on the surface, somehow soothing the doubt and ache his current predicament brought him with but _it was short-lived_.

 

The continued silence in the room bit by bit tore at Kageyama’s newly found happiness and realization, he started to notice his surroundings and most definitely, he noticed how still and quiet Miya Atsumu is being. He was probably being arrogant in a way but Kageyama really believed that his senpai would be happy in hearing his confession and the opposite reaction from the older setter unsettled him- feelings of rejection and betrayal floating at a distance around his heart. His mouth opened and closed repeatedly as he was thinking of ways to diffuse the atmosphere but no words left his lips as the distance and silence stretched between them. Kageyama continued watching his senpai’s back forlornly, a bitter taste building inside his mouth, and although it was hard to swallow, concluded that Miya-san probably wasn’t ready to hear his confession just yet; it was the most hopeful and less heart-shattering conjecture he could come up with and the one he could bear to take as of the moment.

 

Another chiming of the bell brought Kageyama back to his senses, placing a lid on his feelings and emotions for now. He was trembling but he willed himself to stop, telling himself that he should focus on the training camp ahead and deal with the rejection later. His feet started to move on its own accord almost robotically, each step heavier than the last. He was thinking of calling out to his senpai, to regain some semblance of normality and to pretend that he didn’t just confess his love for him but they both knew that it wouldn’t change a thing- _it was now out in the open._

 

He closed his eyes as he passed by him, the squeezing in his chest intensifying- getting harder to ignore. He was at the door when he steeled himself to look back, wanting to check and hoping that his senpai was looking at him the same way he was looking at him right now- _penuriously._ Kageyama’s dark blue eyes glossed over as he watched Miya-san’s figure not looking back at him at all, the light-haired fringe of the best setter in Tokyo covering his senpai’s eyes as his head was bowed slightly, _looking anything but lost_.

 

Kageyama softly clicked the door open and went outside, his footsteps padded against the loud thudding of his heart. He slowed down his pace unconsciously, still hoping that Miya-san would rush out the door and catch up to him; but as he neared the lift, he realized that his senpai wouldn’t follow him _this time_ , and it hurts more than anything else.

 

This is probably the break they needed, to heal from the heartaches they caused each other and to re-confirm their feelings, but Kageyama was sure of one thing- _he was willing to wait for Miya-san’s wounds to heal._


	24. Chapter 24

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was able to squeeze some time to write this and I hope you'll love it. Thank you as always for the never-ending support. <3

** KAGEYAMA **

“You sure are looking sharp this time, Kageyama.” Sakusa-san complimented, handling the worn out Kageyama a bottle of water. “You’re making fewer mistakes and the set-up from your toss seemed to get sharper and more accurate each time; feels like your wrist wasn’t injured at all.”

 

Kageyama nodded in acknowledgment, his raven locks- now longer than usual- plastered on his clammy face and somehow obscuring half of his eyes. He looked over Sakusa-san’s hunched and laidback figure, noting the honest gaze in his eyes and chose to stay silent, slowly drinking the water and letting its coldness washed over his fatigue and worries. He could feel some of his pent-up tension unwound, giving himself a teeny bit of relaxation. He’d been tightly strung ever since he stepped foot in the gym a while ago, the gazes of his teammates seemed to grow in weight, its heaviness almost too much for him to handle. He was thankful when their coach gave him penalty drills for being late; it took his focus off of them and let him barely collect himself- pushing the indirect rejection out of his thoughts for now. He knew dwelling on Miya-san’s silence wouldn’t do him any good and although he was fully aware of that, _it doesn’t make it hurt any less_.

 

He took his time drinking, allowing himself to observe Sakusa-san and to compose an answer in his mind. He was grateful that his senpai seemed to genuinely care and keen on his tossing alone- not concocting a ploy to get some information out of him, like some of his teammates did. Kageyama knew that they meant no harm; though to be honest, he was aware of some of the disgusting gazes thrown his way because of his preference- but being gay means having to deal with that kind of discrimination and not letting it affect you.

 

“I’ve been practicing,” he finally answered, nonchalantly lifting the hem of his shirt and wiping the sweat on his brows. Kageyama caught Sakusa-san staring at his bare abdomen a little longer than usual and abruptly release his hold, clearing his throat _twice_ to clear the awkwardness. “The moment my doctor issued my clearance for the game, I’ve been hitting and tossing the ball more than I could count.” He added lamely when Sakusa-san averted his eyes slightly, the tip of his ears as red as an apple.

 

“That’s nice.” Sakusa-san replied _distractedly_ , “You really are diligent.”

 

Kageyama let the conversation fall after that- partly because he wasn’t sure what else to say, they were never that close to begin with though Sakusa-san was always nice to him, and partly because he didn’t want to tell his senpai that although it was him who goes to the gym diligently to practice, it was Miya-san who helped him through all that- the promise of good fucking after each session was too tempting and dangerously delicious to pass on.

 

His eyes sought Miya-san’s figure as the thought of him filled Kageyama’s mind without warning, his heart aching to be near him. He saw him doing plyometrics across the gym, the squeaking of the older setter’s shoes as it continuously hit the ground after each jump seemed to echo loudly in the four corners of the court. Miya-san has been banned from participating in the rest of the practice games for the day as punishment for skipping the first half of it and was instead given a set of tedious and cumbersome drills to teach him a lesson. Kageyama’s dark blue orbs greedily drank the sweating view of his senpai as he obediently does his fair share of chastisement, the sight making his heart beat erratically inside his chest- the overwhelming emotions he harbored towards Miya-san never ceases to surprise him. He swallowed hard to calm his racing pulse and tried to hold on to the bittersweet feeling he now held in his heart.

 

Kageyama regretted not accepting and acknowledging his feelings sooner than he could; he hated himself for letting his fear and cowardice get the best of him. He thought that there was no other chance of love beyond Oikawa-san- that giving him his heart wholeheartedly and having it broken into a thousand pieces was game over for him- but surprisingly, Miya-san happened, and if he’d just let him mend the fragmented parts of him sooner, he might be in his arms right now. As if sensing his stare, Miya-san stopped and looked at him directly, the intensity in his eyes enough to make Kageyama reddened all over.

 

He used to be so close in reading the meaning behind Miya-san’s usually no-nonsense stare, he used to be able to tell when he was happy, sad, irritated or just downright horny; but gazing at those eyes that used to look at him with abandoned longing seemed so foreign now- _they were back at square one_. Kageyama found himself stepping towards the older setter’s direction as panic gripped him; Miya-san had never been this distant before, it looked like his _heart had closed off for him_. His ears are ringing and his sight was a little hazy as he kept on marching forward, dark blue orbs locked on a pair of hazel eyes. Kageyama’s thoughts seemed to work double time, looking for the _right_ words to say to have Miya-san open up to him once more. Yes, he is selfish; he’d always been selfish with Miya-san- and it’s probably because he was the only person who let him feel that it was alright to not sacrifice his happiness and what he wants for the sake of someone else.

 

He doubled his pace, adamant on not letting the person who taught him how to _love again_ slipped past his fingertips, and was nearing Miya-san when the slightest shake of his head and pained, fearful eyes stopped Kageyama on his tracks, his legs seemed to turn into lead. The gesture was more than enough to tell Kageyama to _back off and for his growing fears to come into reality_. He realized just now that he’d hurt Miya-san probably more than _Oikawa-san had hurt him_ , and knowing it made it all the more excruciatingly painful.

 

Kageyama wanted to hit his head repeatedly for half-heartedly leading his senpai on and for unwittingly toying with his heart. He knew that he’d been arrogant, albeit subconsciously, when Miya-san confessed his love and his willingness to wait for him. It allowed him to disregard his senpai’s feelings and to act with some sense of superiority towards him- to gain some semblance of domination he always has inside the volleyball court- and it was like repeating his _relationship with Kunimi all over again_ ; but the difference this time is, Miya-san has succeeded in stealing his heart and making him _fall in love with him_.

 

The whistle from their coach sliced through the hush that filled the gym when he started walking over to Miya-san’s side, the heavy footsteps and squeaking of rubber shoes against the floor domineering to Kageyama’s hollowed ears. He knew he ought to start moving soon, the next practice match will start in a few but Kageyama remained rooted to the spot, focused on Miya-san. They remained silently gazing at each other, their eyes conveying what words and physical touch cannot. He could vividly hear his inner voice shouting and screaming inside his head, _I love you. I love you. I love you_ , but he swallowed down the words as tears pooled at the corners of his eyes.

 

Kageyama thought that Miya-san only needed time, _time to heal the wounds he’d caused him_ , and that after he’d have it and the both of them was able to sort themselves out- they will inevitably get back together like magnets that couldn’t stay apart for far too long. He resolved to wait for him, _no matter how long it takes_ , and not really letting him go; but looking at the small part of him that he’d broke made Kageyama think of another alternative _he fervently wished and hoped he should never be allowed to do_ \- maybe letting Miya-san’s wounds to heal _means letting him go_.

 

He dragged his feet as he pivots away from Miya Atsumu and the sound of a nail hammered down his coffin ringing in his head was drowned by a whistle signaling the start of a new game.


	25. Chapter 25

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been too long since the last time I updated and I am very sorry about that. Life's been taking much of my time nowadays and I was happy that I was able to squeeze some time to write this short chapter. Thank you for being patient with me and for sending me your love. I hope you all have a great day~

** ATUSUMU **

Atsumu continued the drills, incessantly jumping over the plyometric box over and over again even if his lungs were screaming for respite. He knew he was really pushing it- going over the boundaries- but he couldn’t stop himself from moving even as his vision started to dim. Tobio’s confession rung in his head like a loop, its echoes seemed like a mockery to _his bleeding heart_. If he’s being honest with himself, Tobio’s confession shoot electricity up and down his body, his heart jumping with joy; he’d waited forever to hear his kouhai reciprocate his love but the _emptiness and darkness_ filling him for the past few weeks overturned those feelings in a heartbeat- and now he was left with nothing but _mixed feelings_.

 

He _is_ scared, he knew it so well that it frightens him so. He wasn’t exactly sure what it is that is causing him to lose heart- maybe it was the premature _taste of rejection and betrayal_ or maybe it was the darkness still _lurking behind his heart_ \- but whatever the reason is, he knew he ought to clear these feelings soon if he doesn’t want to risk losing Tobio, _again_. And at least, he _is_ sure of one thing- Atsumu wouldn’t risk losing Kageyama Tobio over something like this, he loves him so much to let him go.

 

His pacing increased as he tried to clear his thoughts, desperately wiping Tobio’s teary face off of his mind. He could hear the squeaking of shoes and slamming of ball against flesh in the background but he focused on evening his breath and trying to see past the dimness now threatening to swallow him whole. He was too concentrated on what he was doing that he didn’t hear at first the voices calling his attention, telling him to stop, it was not until someone firmly tug at his arm to halt him that he became aware of his surroundings. Atsumu breathe erratically as he tried to gasp for air, his chest aching and his mouth too dry. He shook his head once to lift the fog away from his eyes and slowly looked behind him; Oikawa Tooru was standing there with Tobio slightly behind him, the sight pushed him overboard and the pent up feelings he’d harbored for weeks suddenly sprang to life.

 

Atsumu openly welcomed the darkness that wrought around his entire being and with all his might, he threw himself over his senpai and punched his face repeatedly, savoring the feeling of the other’s blood splattering against his knuckles- his deranged state taking pleasure with it. It took three of his teammates to get him off of Oikawa, their grip hardening on his skin as he tried to break free, not yet fully satisfied with the beating he’d given his senpai. He could barely hear their coach angrily sputtering at his outburst, his eyes busy scanning the damage he’d done to Oikawa’s face. He smiled evilly when he saw the splotches of blood now covering his once handsome face and Atsumu couldn’t help but think that _the pretty face Tobio fell so hard for was no more_. He was dragged off away from the site and was escorted towards his room, a promise of hard retribution to come. He barely glanced at his teammates concerned voice before they left him be and stayed standing still on the spot they’d left him for a couple of minutes more. Atsumu could feel his bloody knuckles aching and although he felt some release from the uproar he’d caused, it was still not enough to clear him of his _darker thoughts_ , he needed more.

 

It was at that exact spot and state of mind when Tobio found him, the dark onyx eyes he loves staring cautiously and with concern at him. Every muscle in his body tensed in anticipation and although a small part of him wanted to warn the younger setter of the dangers that will soon befall him, Atsumu just thought that _Tobio chose a wrong time to comfort him_.


	26. Chapter 26

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You've been warned. :]
> 
> Enjoy!

** ATSUMU **

Atsumu stood still on the spot, every muscle in his body wound tightly- coiled for striking. He watched silently as Tobio tentatively closed the door behind him, the way his kouhai was fidgeting and trembling fed his ego and brought an uncanny smile to his face. His breathing evened out, his eyes hungrily devouring Tobio’s figure on the spot, _dark thoughts swirling on his mind_ , and he waited- waited for his prey to approach him. He watched as Tobio hesitated for a bit before finally facing him, the redness around his eyes telling him how hard he’d bawled his eyes out.

 

Tobio’s onyx eyes met his own unwaveringly, the questioning glint in those orbs telling him of the thousand queries his kouhai seemed to want to ask of him. He knew even without Tobio verbally telling him of how he’d scared the shit out of him and he really couldn’t blame him; and yet, he was here in this room- _with him_. He’d always loved this stupidly courageous side of Tobio and even though it irked him a little bit that his kouhai seemed to have a penchant for ignoring danger, the darkness inside of him was glad that Tobio came on their room on his own accord- coming straight to his own _demise_.

 

He tried not to lick his tongue in anticipation as he watched Tobio took a step toward him, the darkness inside of him _growing every second, feeding his wrath and despair_. His ears were ringing so loud that he could barely make out the question Tobio had just raised, his eyes too intent on looking at the chapped lips of Tobio and imagining the things he would do with that mouth. Maybe from frustration or maybe from misplaced bravery but Tobio made the wrong choice the second his skin came into contact with Atsumu- _you should never touch a wound up animal_.

 

Atsumu embraced the darkness rising forth from deep within him and without warning, he gripped Tobio by the shoulders and pushed him rather roughly onto the wall. He heard Tobio’s sharp intake of breath but he took no notice of it as he started nipping and biting at the exposed flesh of his kouhai’s neck, intent on leaving the traces of his lips behind. He mercilessly tugged at the tips of Tobio’s hair, angling it so that more flesh would be exposed for him to feast on. A cry of pleasure and pain left his kouhai’s lips unbidden and Atsumu found himself growing more aroused and angry by the second. He tugged at Tobio’s neck a little harder, testing if he will fight for control, and when he didn’t he couldn’t suppress the feelings of delight and valor that filled him- _he could do whatever he wants with Tobio-kun, it seems._ He licked and sucked on the area until it turned red and raw, all the while gripping Tobio’s hip harder than he should- without a doubt leaving some bruises behind. Atsumu wanted to be gentler but the image of Tobio and Tooru-san kissing kept on popping inside his head, taunting him and egging him to act on his anger. He unconsciously bit too hard on Tobio’s nape, earning a sharp cry of pain from the younger setter, and to ease some of the pain, he licked on the area and kissed it as gently as his crazy-driven self would allow. The hand gripping Tobio’s hip started traveling the length of warm flesh beneath the shirt, eagerly tracing it and marking the areas he would soon explore. His fingertips brushed against the budding nipples of Tobio, eliciting a moan of surprise and pleasure that send jolts of electricity straight down to his raging erection. He knew how sensitive the younger setter is and he knew so well how he liked being sucked on the nipples that Atsumu couldn’t help but playfully tug and twist on it harder _and harder_ until Tobio yelped and writhed beneath him. Atsumu stopped nipping on the younger setter’s neck and risked glancing at his face, the soft yet pleasure drowned look he was showing intensifying the flames of desire coating him whole. Atsumu straightened, but not so much that he isn’t touching Tobio, and watched closely as his kouhai’s eyes fluttered open and stared at him- a mixture of emotions passing through it, _desire, passion, inquisitiveness, despair, sorrow, and love_.

 

“Miya-san­­, sorry-“

 

Atsumu twisted Tobio’s puckered nipples harder and inserted two of his fingers inside his mouth to shut him up. He knew, even without his kouhai repeatedly saying it, how sorry he’d been and although Atsumu wanted to ignore the hurt he’d felt and moved on with Tobio, he just couldn’t deny himself the opportunity to punish the younger setter and beat some sense of submission into him. He desperately wanted to mark Tobio’s whole body with traces of him, to show the both of them whom the younger setter really belonged with. Atsumu started pumping his fingers inside Tobio’s mouth _in and out_ , growling with delight as the vibrations of Tobio’s moan rattled against his slender fingers. He watched as Tobio’s eyes threatened to shut close in pleasure, and without warning, Atsumu flicked, pulled and twisted on his kouhai’s nipples rhythmically- the onyx eyes he’d love so much begging on him for release.

 

“Tell me what you want me to do Tobio.” He started and pulled harder and harder on the younger setter’s sensitive nipples when he made a motion of shaking his head no. “Tell me.” Atsumu repeated, his voice laced with a hint of suppressed anger and demand. He pulled his fingers out of Tobio’s mouth and nipples and waited for the response he knew would come.

 

Tobio’s eyes darted anywhere else but him, his lips trembling slightly before whispering shyly the answer to his question. “I want you to- I want you to suck me here.” Tobio pointed on his chest, his cheeks burning in embarrassment.

 

“Where?” Atsumu asked, and he almost couldn’t hide the evil grin on his face. He relished in seeing Tobio suffer from abashment and although he’d always let him be, he wouldn’t be that soft with him this time- _no, not this time, he needs to learn his lesson_.

 

Tobio looked at him dubiously, as if asking if he was _being real_ , and when his kouhai saw that he wouldn’t budge anytime soon, softly whispered, “N-nipples.”

 

“That wasn’t so hard was it?” Atsumu grinned and lifted Tobio’s still damp shirt. “Hold it and don’t let it go.” He warned. Atsumu slowly ducked down and feasted his eyes on Tobio’s pink puckered nipples, blowing on it evilly as Tobio jolted in surprise. His eyes subconsciously wandered towards the hip he’d gripped a while ago, angry red marks marring the flesh beneath it, and his fingertips gently brushed over it as if in apology. Atsumu found himself gently flicking one of the puckered buds with his tongue, probing how sensitive the younger setter is- tasting the mixture of sweat and salt pasted on his skin. Cries of pleasure from his kouhai fueled Atsumu’s desire and he found himself eagerly sucking on the younger setter’s nipples, ravaging him with his mouth and tongue. His groin ached in pain as his erection continued building and Atsumu’s hands gripped Tobio’s hips and arched him towards him as he continued showering his torso with kisses.

 

Tobio made a mistake of letting his shirt fall and Atsumu stopped altogether what he was doing, their heavy breathing filling the air. Tobio frantically lifted his shirt again, exposing his raw nipples but Atsumu had something else on his mind. “Suck me,” he ordered. He watched in delightful anticipation as Tobio unquestioningly kneeled before him, pulling his drawstring pants up to his ankles, exposing his all too hard penis. He sucked in his breath as he watched Tobio’s mouth closed around his penis, the warm sensation of it enough to drive him a little bit _crazier_. Tobio expertly licked the length of his erection eagerly and played with his balls, eliciting a growl from Atsumu. He could feel his kouhai smiled despite himself and probably due to the fact that he could elicit such a strong response from Atsumu, grew bolder and more willing to suck the length of him inside his mouth. Tobio started slowly at first, sucking him _in and out_ , and as Atsumu’s cries of pleasure grew louder by the minute, Tobio sucked him _faster and harder as his mouth would allow_. Atsumu found himself leaning on the wall, his forearms tensed for support and restraint; he could feel his orgasm building on his groin and as the pleasure was too much to handle, he gripped and pushed Tobio’s head against his penis and fuck his face anew- all the while cursing and spouting how Tobio _is his_. His semen spurted inside Tobio’s mouth, his back arching in undeniable pleasure; he held Tobio still against his groin and gruffly ordered, “Swallow it whole,” to which his kouhai obeyed a little too enthusiastically. They stayed like that for a few minutes as Atsumu waited for the waves of his pleasure to subside. He panted roughly and closed his eyes shut, a trickle of tears pouring down his cheeks without warning as his emotions overwhelmed him. _He is too deeply in love with the young genius setter and he could feel himself losing a part of him to him_.

 

“Get up,” he ordered after a while. Tobio saw the stains of tears on his cheeks and made a move to touch him but Atsumu retracted- _he needed to finish punishing Tobio for the both of them to move on_. “Undress and stay on all fours on the bed, your head towards the headrest.” Atsumu watched as Tobio silently followed his orders, the sight of his asshole up in the air and facing him was enough to renew his raging erection. Atsumu took off his clothes slower than he’d like, wanting Tobio to fidget in anticipation as to what he will do. He slowly approached the bed from where Tobio was lying face down across from him and without warning, his hand hit Tobio’s butt cheeks in succession, each succeeding slap harder than the last. He poured his frustrations and anger on each slap, his eyes blurring slightly as he let go of his emotions- the _darkness slowly ebbing away._ Tobio buckled beneath him, his pitiful cries a stab to Atsumu’s already bleeding heart. He stopped on the 10th count and slowly massaged Tobio’s red behind, wanting to ease some of the pain he’d caused. He could hear Tobio repeatedly whispering _I’m sorry Miya-san_ over and over again but he refused to answer for now, his focus intent on pleasuring Tobio. Atsumu went down on his knees, still massaging Tobio’s sore ass and as a form of apology, he flicked his tongue inside Tobio’s hole, causing the younger setter to jolt away from him in surprise. He gripped Tobio’s butt a little harder in warning to stay in place and his kouhai relented; Atsumu resumed playing with Tobio’s hole, his tongue now going in and out, trying to relax Tobio’s anal sphincter. Tobio writhed in pleasure before him, his once anguish cried now replaced with mewls of undeniable _pleasure and desire_. Atsumu gripped his hardened length with one hand and started pumping, while his other hand was busy probing with the hole with its fingers. He inserted two fingers at once, making a seesaw attempt to push open Tobio’s anal hole- _in and out, in and out_. He could feel Tobio trembling before him, a telltale sign that he was close to coming and Atsumu quickens his pace, inserting a third finger to Tobio’s hole. He heard Tobio’s howl of pleasure as he orgasmed, his hips pushing forward as his back arched in abandoned pleasure. Atsumu continued pumping Tobio for a while before getting up and positioning himself at his hole, his length now rock hard. Not really letting Tobio had any time to adjust, Atsumu inserted his dick inside his kouhai without warning and grabbed him by the wrists, fucking him harder and faster- their moans and grunts filling the entire room. He heard himself demand whom Tobio belonged with, whom Tobio loved more, and every time the younger setter will scream _Miya-san, only you Miya-san_ , Atsumu would thrust deeper and deeper, penetrating inside Tobio _balls deep_. They continued fucking like rabbits in a heat for a while and just as they both reached their climax once again, Atsumu smashed his lips against Tobio’s hungrily, _dominating him_.

 

“I love you so much Tobio,” he croaked.

 

“I love you too Miya-san.”

****

 


	27. Chapter 27

** KAGEYAMA **

Kageyama scowled to no one in particular as he slowly retrieved each worn out ball from the floor; each movement painful than the first, his behind screaming in protest. Miya-san and he had been making love until the morning as if to rewrite what has been, and the fruits of that action manifested in him barely able to walk straight. At some point in time, someone knocked angrily at their door, shouting for them to shut up and let the poor man sleep; and they relented for a while but it didn’t last for long- which will explain why he was given the task of cleaning the balls and the gym after the practice as punishment. Kageyama’s ears turned red as he remembered how tactlessly their coach called them out for _incessantly making noise_ as he lightly put it, and he refused to remember how many times he’d been teased about it. The devil, who was responsible for making him let out all that noise, seemed to relish in all the attention and was wide smile all the time even though the punishment given to his recent outburst was severe. Miya Atsumu was banned to play for their next two official matches and was commanded to jog around the perimeter of their camp ten times without rest. He was also prohibited from participating in their practice matches and was instead given a set of individual rigorous drills to do during the remainder of their training camp, but the penalty his senpai seemed to bristle on was the fact that he needs to accompany Oikawa Tooru for one whole day. Kageyama was a little relieved that Miya-san was not as angry at the idea as he’d been a few weeks ago and although he doubted that they would make up soon, he was a bit complacent that they will act civilly towards each other.

 

He’d been careful to move on the same vicinity as Oikawa, calculating his movements and his steps so as not to cause undue rift between the two older setters, again. He approached him once in the morning, apologizing for what his lover had done- to which his senpai just smiled and ruffled his hair. Kageyama caught Miya-san looking at them but he didn’t cause a fuss to which he was grateful; what he did was pull him towards himself when the whole thing was done and kissed him in front of everyone. He could feel their teammates' eyes on them for the remainder of the practice, probably having a feel of the atmosphere and bracing themselves on what is come; but thankfully, the day ended without any accident.

 

And here he is now, struggling to pick up the balls from the floor as his back continued to cause him pain. Kageyama scrubbed on the ball religiously before throwing it on the rack, too intent on finishing the rest of it as fast as he could that he somehow lose track of time. He was on his last ball when Miya Atsumu came running towards him, his ragged breaths filling the silence Kageyama was previously bathed in.

 

“Water,” his senpai croaked before collapsing face up on the floor.

Kageyama scrambled to his feet and half-ran half-walk towards the bleachers across the gym, ignoring the sting each movement caused. He got the water jug he’d refilled a while ago and snatched a clean towel on the way before jogging back towards his lover’s side. He knelt on the ground slowly, raised the towel and wiped Miya’s sweat with it. Miya’s eyes fluttered open and zeroed in on Kageyama’s face, the soft look on those orbs flushed Kageyama’s cheeks anew. He tried to hide his embarrassment by throwing the towel on his senpai’s face, perfectly covering it whole, and just before he was able to snatch back his hand, Miya Atsumu captured it with his own and kissed the inside of his palm softly.

 

“I thought you wanted water?” Kageyama deadpanned, looking anywhere but his senpai’s face.

 

“Mm-mm,” Miya responded, still sucking on the soft flesh of his wrist. Kageyama fidgeted as his senpai continued his kisses, growing higher by the second.

 

“I-I’m sweaty,” Kageyama complained half-heartedly, his breaths coming out in puffs as he anticipated what the older setter will do next.

 

“Is that an invitation?” Miya Atsumu queried playfully, his face now close to Kageyama’s own. The older setter winked as Kageyama’s mouth opened and closed in disbelief and lightly kissed him on the forehead. “I’m just joking but I bet you liked that.”

 

Kageyama pushed Miya-san in indignation and tried to pull off but his senpai wouldn’t let him go, his arms wound on his waist firmly, his chuckles echoing in the gym. Kageyama relented and let himself be enveloped by Miya’s warmth, finding solace in it. He squeezed his body closer to his senpai’s side, his forehead resting on the older guy’s shoulder, taking comfort at every breath he took; and Kageyama couldn’t help but think _how easy it is to fall madly in love with Miya Atsumu_.

 

“How was the penalty? I thought you’d be gone until midnight?”

 

Kageyama felt Miya-san moved, reaching for the bottle of water with one hand whilst the other was resting on his back. He waited for him to finish drinking patiently, his eyes closing a little bit. “I jogged twice as hard, betting you’d be here all alone, waiting for me,” Kageyama smiled at that and he knew that his senpai knew it too. “I even negotiated with the coach and have him place me and Oikawa-san at the same room for three hours and-

 

Kageyama sat up too fast that he hit his head on Miya’s chin. “Careful,” his lover scolded as he went ahead and touched it gently. “And,” Miya Atsumu continued, looking at him firmly to which Kageyama smiled sheepishly. “Everything’s cool.”

 

“Cool?” He asked incredulously, not believing what he was hearing. “You almost killed the guy yesterday remember?”

 

“Well, you weren’t _exclusively_ mine yesterday,” Miya answered seriously. “Besides, we talked it out and reached an agreement- with him not touching and _kissing_ you. I understood the guy better this time but it doesn’t change the fact that I still don’t like him.”

 

Miya kissed him on the forehead once again. “Don’t look too surprised, I could be charming and forgiving if I want to.” His senpai joked. “It also saves me the trouble of taking him out of the equation; and now, it only leaves me with one more.”

 

“What?” Kageyama asked, puzzled.

 

“Nothing. C’mon let me help you with cleaning the gym.”

 

“You’ve already done too much for a day and you’re tired-“

 

“I could never be tired when it comes to you. Now let’s hurry and take a bath after this.” Miya disentangled himself from Kageyama but not without stealing a kiss from his lips. Kageyama scowled in answer to hide his flushed cheeks and followed his senpai, _a smile never leaving his mouth_.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for being patient with me. I hope you like this chapter; and hopefully, I'd be able to update soon and make the most out of my scarce day-off. Merry Christmas everyone!


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